


A Friend in Need

by Incandescentflower



Category: 30歳まで童貞だと魔法使いになれるらしい | Cherry Magic! Thirty Years of Virginity Can Make You a Wizard?! (TV)
Genre: A little bit of Kidfic, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blow Jobs, Confessions, Eventual Happy Ending, Fantasizing, Hand Jobs, Kinda of a version of the "Friends with Benefits" trope, Kurosawa starts at the company after Adachi gets his mind reading ability, M/M, Masturbation, Misunderstandings, Pining, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, oblivious boys, relatively slow burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-30
Updated: 2021-01-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 23:15:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 24,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28435230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Incandescentflower/pseuds/Incandescentflower
Summary: On Adachi's 30th birthday he gains the ability to read people's minds when he touches them. His coworker Urabe suggests it is because he is still a virgin.The ability is sometimes strange and after a while, distressing. In a moment of desperation, Adachi reveals his ability to his new, handsome coworker, Kurosawa, who suggests he may be able to help. Can Kurosawa help Adachi find his way to losing his powers? And will they catch feelings along the way? (Spoiler, they will).Or, a friends with benefits-style fic with the twist of trying to rid Adachi of his mind-reading ability.Note: I have had a lot of people tell me they weren't sure they would like this because of the friends with benefits trope, but did. To be clear, this is a twist on that trope where Kurodachi take it relatively slowly and there are an epic ton of feels.
Relationships: Adachi Kiyoshi/Kurosawa Yuichi
Comments: 158
Kudos: 336
Collections: Cherry Magic - 31 Days of Prompts Can Turn you into a Wizard!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Cherry Magic 31 Prompts: Confessions and Emoji Clip.
> 
> Thanks for the brainstorming and the beta by [Tenillypo](/users/Tenillypo/)

When Adachi turned 30, his life changed drastically. Out of the blue, without any warning, he began to be able to hear people’s thoughts when he touched them. 

Urabe said it was because he was still a virgin. There was apparently an urban legend that said if you were still a virgin when you turned 30 then you would become a magic user. Adachi had no independent confirmation of this. He didn’t think he knew anyone else who was a magic user. But he also had no idea whether anyone he knew over 30 was still a virgin. 

At first it seemed as though it could be a delusion. He thought he might have let Urabe’s words worm into his subconscious and grab a hold of his most fragile self. He could be going mad. He let it rattle around in his head. The possibility that he was hearing things that weren’t there. 

Adachi would consider it at night, spiral about it, unsure what to do. He considered telling his mother, but she would worry about him. He considered telling Tsuge, but he thought he could decide to never speak to him again. But it didn’t take long before he discovered he learned things that there was no other possible way he would know and that he had to accept this was real.

* * *

A day not long after Adachi accepted his abilities, he had been working at his desk, like any other day, trying to keep to himself, again, like any other day. But there was a stir over at the photocopier. 

“Did you hear about the new hire?” Urabe asked.

“No,” Adachi said, not looking up.

“The Chief recruited him from _Pentel._ He made that presentation at the Tokyo conference about the “State of the Stationary Industry” that everyone was a buzz about.”

“That was him?” Adachi asked, his jaw dropped. “Kurosawa Yuichi?”

Kurosawa Yuichi was a bit famous in the stationary industry. He had made some suggestions that some felt were outlandish, while others thought them revolutionary. The point was that people took notice. It didn’t hurt that he was known to be incredibly handsome as well. 

“Adachi,” Rokkaku broke into his internal spiral. “This is our new salesman.”

“Hello,” he said, giving Adachi a blaring smile. “Kurosawa Yuichi,” he introduced himself with a bow. 

“Oh, ah, Adachi Kiyoshi. Nice to meet you,” he returned a bow. Before Adachi could say any more, a number of other coworkers came by, introducing themselves, asking him questions.

He was so smooth and easy, his motions were like dancing, every movement choreographed to be aesthetically pleasing. All the people around him laughed at his jokes and hung on his every word. He had been there less than an hour and he was already the most popular person in the office. 

“Did you know Kurosawa was a champion baseball player in high school?” Urabe asked Adachi as he was sitting at his desk, doing his best to focus on his work. 

“Yes, I heard something about that,” Adachi mumbled. 

_I should try to get him to work with me on the Muji account. Chief would be so impressed._

Adachi looked down and found that Urabe’s foot was touching his. He pulled it away quickly. He tried to be aware of his body, aware of his surroundings since he had gained his ability, but it was almost impossible. He didn’t think he was a very touchy person, but he had no idea the amount of contact he had with people throughout the day until he could read others thoughts.

* * *

Adachi had yet again agreed to help Urabe finish a project. He didn’t mind too much really. He only occasionally had plans to meet Tusge after work and Urabe had a family, but it sometimes bothered him that he now often didn’t really ask and just expected Adachi would say yes. 

“Adachi, right?” The smooth voice came from behind him. Adachi startled. He swiveled in his chair to face Kurosawa standing over his shoulder. It had been about a week since Kurosawa had joined the company and Adachi had seen him a few times in passing but they hadn’t really spoken. “Do you always work this late?”

“Oh,” Adachi stammered. “Yes, well, sometimes. I like to help out.” 

Kurosawa sat down next to him and said, “May I?”

Adachi nodded. Kurosawa picked up some of the files he had on his desk. “Oh, I know this company,” Kurosawa said. “Pentel had a contract with them a few years ago. Are you trying to sell to them?”

“Yes,” Adachi said. “Well, Urabe is. He asked me to gather their sales data from the last ten years on their stationary products. I’m having some trouble finding some of the relevant marketing data.”

“Mmmm,” Kurosawa said, frowning a bit as he was looking at the document. His hand shifted over and pressed against Adachi’s arm.

_Adachi really cares about his work. He seems very diligent._

“Oh, thanks,” Adachi said, still shifting through the other papers on his desk. Adachi winced when he realized he had responded to Kurosawa’s thought.

“Thanks?” Kurosawa echoed. “Oh, for the help? Sure.”

Kurosawa leaned in to grab another report off Adachi’s desk.

_Wow, Adachi smells good. Is that his soap? Or his detergent? Maybe his shampoo?_

Adachi pulled his hand away, not wanting to further discover thoughts he could not wipe from his mind. Although there were worse things than knowing someone thought you smelled good, he supposed.

Adachi and Kurosawa worked together for a bit. It was nice to have someone with him at the office this late at night and despite only knowing each other for a short time Kurosawa was easy to be around. When they walked out together, Adachi thanked Kurosawa for his help. It was a kindness he had not expected and would not soon forget.

* * *

“Adachi! Come with us for drinks!” Rokkaku yelled as he chased after Adachi outside the elevator. “We are celebrating Kurosawa’s first week with us.”

“Thanks, but I need to get home,” Adachi said. After work social situations always made him feel a bit uncomfortable. Now that he had this power, it was excruciating, the feeling as though he was constantly unintentionally intruding on others.

“But Kurosawa asked me to invite you specifically,” he said. 

Adachi stopped for a moment. He felt an unexpected tug at this, a curiosity. “Please tell him thank you,” Adachi said and headed home.

* * *

A few weeks later, Adachi and Fujisaki began working on a project for the Chief. They had been asked to come up with ideas for new products and the two of them had been gathering market research and consumer data to determine what their pitches would be. As Adachi went to grab one of the reports next to Fujisaki, his hand brushed hers.

_Hmm, the company appears to be underselling to the under 25 demographic. A product targeted to them would be the most appealing._

Adachi took a closer look at the report he had selected. Fujisaki was absolutely correct. Adachi had been considering proposing emoji clips for office usage. But he could see these working for that target demographic as well, if that is what the company decided.

* * *

At the presentation, Adachi showed his product and pitched his reasoning. 

“But which of Toyokawa's current sales numbers makes you think this is a good product?”

Adachi felt flushed. He had thought about this. He had put together some numbers, but he drew a complete blank. He said the first thing that came to his head “Toyokawa is underselling to the under 25 demographic. This product would appeal to them due to its function and design.”

The Chief nodded, his expression appearing pleased.

“Thank you, Adachi. Fujisaki?” He said, “Are you ready for your proposal?”

Fujisaki was a bit pink. She looked somewhat flustered. Adachi had used her idea and it seemed to have thrown her off. She stammered through her presentation. Ultimately, it was Adachi’s that was selected.

* * *

“Adachi! We must celebrate!” Rokkaku came wheeling along, throwing an overly zealous pat on Adachi’s back, sending him lurching forward. 

“I...uh,” Adachi stammered.

“You can’t say no this time. We are celebrating you!”

Adachi’s chest tightened. They were celebrating a mistake. 

Adachi sat at the table at the restaurant, idly playing with the straw in his drink. Fujisaki sat on the end, her face blank. She was usually so vibrant and happy. Adachi knew her distress was all his fault. 

The feelings of guilt and disappointment in himself were only further exacerbated by every congratulatory comment, every pat on the back he received. Adachi could not take it any longer. He ordered himself a drink and started to drown everything out.

Adachi did not really drink. It only took a couple of glasses to loosen his body, to loosen his lips. The next time Rokkaku tried to congratulate him, Adachi said emphatically, “I don’t deserve it,” and put his head down on the table.

“Adachi,” Kurosawa said, sitting down next to him. “Are you alright?” He placed his hand on Adachi’s shoulder.

_He’s even beautiful when he is out of sorts. Is there any time he doesn’t look like an angel?_

Adachi let out a “pffft” noise and batted the thoughts away. “I am no angel.”

Kurosawa's eyes went wide, looking completely mortified. “Did I…” his voice trailed off.

“I need some air,” Adachi said, pushing himself to standing and staggering out the door. 

“Adachi,” Kurosawa called after him. “I don’t think it’s wise to go anywhere by yourself right now.”

Kurosawa followed Adachi out to the roof where he made his way to the railing and looked out at the landscape. The world was big and bright. Adachi wished he felt like he belonged in it. But he was an imposter. He should not even be here.

“Adachi, do you need me to take you home?” Kurosawa asked. “I think you’ve had too much to drink.” He grabbed Adachi’s arm as he swayed again, steadying him. 

_Why is Adachi so sad when he should be celebrating? Wow, he looks so sexy even when he is like this. His lips are so perfect. That mole above his lip is so distracting._

“I shouldn’t be celebrating!” Adachi slurred. “I didn’t earn it.”

“Adachi, why?” Kurosawa was still holding him up. 

“Stop being nice to me!” Adachi said, pulling his arm away and dropping down on the ground, rolling himself up in a ball. “I don’t deserve it.” Kurosawa crouched down with him, and placed his hand on Adachi’s upper arm.

_Adachi is so kind and considerate, why would he say such things?_

“I’m not. I’m not. I’m not.” Adachi kept repeating. “I’m not any of those things.”

“Adachi, I’m going to take you home now.” Kurosawa stood up and grasped Adachi’s arm to pull him to standing.

_I’ll have to ask the others where he lives. He can’t get home safely on his own. Perhaps I should offer to have him stay at my apartment tonight._

“I don’t deserve to go to your apartment, Kurosawa!” Adachi blurted. 

Kurosawa paused for a moment, looking puzzled. _Oh he must have thought I meant my home._

“It’s okay Adachi, I’ll make sure it’s okay.”

When they were in the taxi, Adachi’s head began to feel heavy. His eyelids continued to droop, he wanted nothing more than to drift off to sleep. He finally gave into the weight of it and let his head rest firmly on Kurosawa’s shoulder. When the taxi driver asked “Where to?” Adachi mumbled “Minato City, 3 Chome-8-50 Motoazabu” and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

When Adachi awoke, it was on a futon on the floor of an apartment he did not recognize. The furniture was beautiful, sleek and shiny. The window looked out upon the Tokyo skyline. It was definitely a high end apartment building. For some reason Minato City itched in his mind. 

He slid back the blanket, revealing silky, lush pajamas that he was somehow wearing. Adachi blushed. He did not remember changing.

“Ah, you’re awake,” Kurosawa said as she walked into the living room from what appeared to be his bedroom. He was already fully dressed, his clothing neat and tidy as it always was. “Breakfast?” He asked.

“I, uh, sure,” Adachi stammered, not wanting to be rude. He walked over to the table, still fiddling with the pajamas, feeling awkward without his clothes.

“Oh,” Kurosawa said, “Your clothes are on the couch.”

“I, this is embarrassing, but I don’t remember changing?” Adachi kept shifting his eyes from Kurosawa and down, unable to look at him straight on.

Kurosawa gave him a warm smile. “You were a bit out of it last night, but you were still able to change your clothes.”

“Oh good,” Adachi said, letting out a breath.

“With a little help.” Kurosawa’s smile crooked.

Adachi’s eyes widened. “What, uh.” He couldn’t ask. He was too embarrassed. But when Kurosawa sat down across from him he slid his foot against Kurosawa’s to see if he could discover more.

Adachi caught the image of him flopping his shirt off and Kurosawa twisting around, handing him his pajamas, trying to look away. 

Adachi bit his tongue, trying not to groan. He was going to die of embarrassment right there. He grabbed onto the edge of the table trying to stabilize himself, trying to keep the world from spinning. It was possible he was still a little drunk.

_He is so cute when he’s embarrassed._

Adachi violently pulled his foot back again.

“Are you alright, Adachi?” Kurosawa’s face was no longer amused. He now looked concerned. “That didn’t seem like you last night. You were very upset.”

Adachi’s guilt and anger at himself all came crashing back. He could not believe he had allowed himself even a moment of respite from it. He had changed nothing. He had still hurt Fujisaki. He had been given an opportunity he had not earned and he had no way of explaining it to anyone. He dropped his head on the table.

“Adachi,” Kurosawa said, his voice cracking. He stood and placed his hand on his neck.

_Is he ill? Should I call an ambulance? This is what happened to Sato when he got alcohol poisoning in college._

“No!” Adachi called out. “I’m fine. I don’t have alcohol poisoning!”

Kurosawa stepped back. “Adachi, why did you say that?”

“I…,” he stuttered, shoving his hands in his hair and scratching his head in aggravation.

“Last night, you knew where I lived. How did you know that?”

“I…,” Adachi tried again. He was so very tired. He had been holding onto this secret for weeks, trying to keep it all inside. Trying to keep it all to himself. He was hanging on by a thread. He closed his eyes tightly and said, “I can hear people’s thoughts when I touch them.”

When Adachi got up the courage to look at Kurosawa he was standing there quietly observing Adachi. Kurosawa then moved forward and laid his hand on Adachi’s. 

_How would that even be possible?_

Adach had nothing to lose at this point. He answered, “I was a virgin on my 30th birthday and that apparently makes you become a magic user.” Kurosawa furrowed his eyebrows. “Okay, I know. I get it. You don’t believe me. Why would anyone believe this? It’s insane.”

“No, Adachi, I believe you. You just answered my thought. I just don’t see how it has anything to do with being a virgin.”

Adachi shrugged. “It’s what Urabe told me. It’s an urban legend.”

“I’m not certain he is the most reliable of sources.”

“Well, how else do you explain it! I went to bed being 29 years old and normal and woke up 30 years old and this!” Adachi made a large sweeping motion from his head outwards, demonstrating the enormity of all that had been happening to him.

“I’m sorry, Adachi, I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“No, no, I’m sorry Kurosawa, I shouldn’t have raised my voice. I am just kind of freaking out here.”

“Noted.”

“And I accidentally stole Fujisaki’s idea and she is miserable now and I just...I hate this! I just want it to all stop,” Adachi’s voice was trembling. Everything he had been pushing down for the last few weeks was exploding to the surface. All the loneliness. All the secrecy. All the shame. He could feel the tears coming. He couldn’t stop them, his eyes were wet and his chest was shaking. He put his head back down on the table and covered his face.

“Adachi?” Kursosawa said. His voice was so kind. “Do you…” he said, cautiously, “don’t take this the wrong way, but do you want me to help?”

“Help?” Adachi asked, wiping his eyes with the sleeves of the fancy pajamas he was sure he was ruining with his snot. “How can you help?”

Kurosawa slowly put his hand back on Adachi’s that was bawled up on the table.

He saw an image of Kurosawa taking his face, holding it closely and kissing him. 

Adachi swallowed hard. “You want to do _that_?”

“No,” Kurosawa said, “well, yes, but--” He crossed his arms in front of his body and shifted on his feet back and forth. Was Kurosawa nervous? “I mean, if helping you lose your virginity makes this go away for you and you need help with that, I’d, I mean, I’d be willing to help.” 

“I couldn’t ask you to do that just because you feel bad for me, Kurosawa.” Great, now Adachi was such a pathetic case he was being offered sympathy sex. 

“It isn’t because I feel bad for you, Adachi. We’re friends, right? And I want to help. And well, if you can read my thoughts you know I find you attractive. It isn’t like it would be a hardship or anything.”

Adachi’s brain froze. The possibility of having sex to rid him of this power had not even crossed his mind. He thought he would be more likely to go live in the arctic by himself then lose his virginity. But it was an actual possible solution. He looked at Kurosawa again, his beautiful face, his strong arms. Adachi flushed again.

“I…” he stammered, getting up from the table and grabbing his clothes from off the couch. “I need to get dressed.” Then he quickly made his way to the sanctuary of Kurosawa’s bathroom.

When Adachi came back out of the bathroom he was feeling a bit more on solid ground now that he was dressed again. “So, how is this supposed to work? I’m not exactly ready to just jump in bed with someone.” Not even someone as kind, caring and handsome as Kurosawa. “I haven’t even kissed anyone before.”

“It can work whatever way you want it to work,” Kurosawa said, now sitting at the table casually eating breakfast like he did not just propose they have sex together. “We can work up to it. Like I said, we’re friends. We can figure it out.”

Friends. Adachi supposed that was right. He didn’t have many friends, but Kurosawa taking care of him when he had been drunk and offering to help him now was more than most people in his life would offer to do for Adachi.

Before Adachi could think about it too much he said, “Okay.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Zaku for getting the ball rolling on the Fujisaki plot point. :)
> 
> Cherry Magic 31 Prompts: Fujisaki and a little Rokkaku

Kurosawa seemed to understand that although Adachi had agreed to Kurosawa “helping” him, it wasn’t something he could just jump into. They finished breakfast, Kurosawa glancing over at him, half smiling, making Adachi blush. No one had ever unequivocally said that they found him attractive. It was a bit bizarre. 

Adachi saw how popular Kurosawa was. He knew he got attention from many, many women in the office. He hadn’t realized that he was interested in men. But now, based on the way he was looking at Adachi whenever they interacted throughout the day, he could not help but feel like every look was telling him something.

And then there was Fujisaki. Getting rid of his power would prevent these circumstances in the future, but it didn’t make up for what he had done. Every time he saw her, his stomach dropped a little. So he avoided her. And everyone else he could, which was more difficult than Adachi had considered since they worked in an open concept office.

He did his best not to touch others. He took the stairs. He stayed at his desk. He kept to himself.

At the end of the day, Kurosawa walked by Adachi’s desk, greeting him, “How’s your day been, Adachi?” He trailed his finger over the edge of Adachi’s desk slowly and then knocked it on the edge. Adachi’s brain froze for a moment.

“Fine,” Adachi mumbled. 

_Do you want to give our agreement a try?_

Adachi frowned and looked up at Kurosawa, whose face looked relaxed and angelic, an easy innocent smile. Adachi looked down and saw that he had slid his foot next to Adachi’s foot. 

“Kurosawa!” Adachi said, his face feeling hot.

Kurosawa raised his eyebrows. “What, Adachi? Wouldn’t it be irresponsible for us to not start working on this?” He smiled. “Sorry,” he said, his tone light, “if you changed your mind, I understand. No pressure. I just thought I could help.”

Adachi had a moment of panic, wondering how much experience Kurosawa had, whether he would look completely foolish whenever they tried something. But he and Kurosawa had agreed. He had no idea what other trouble he might get himself into if the magic continued. He needed to make the attempt.

* * *

Adachi brought Kurosawa to his apartment, hoping that being in his own home would help him relax a bit. He rushed inside first, straightening up some of the mess before Kurosawa stepped inside. Adachi was never neat, but he had been especially scattered lately and his apartment demonstrated all his chaos within. 

“Would you like something to drink?” Adachi asked, offering Kurosawa a place at his table. Kurosawa even managed to make sitting look formal and elegant. 

Adachi sat adjacent to Kurosawa, still giving him some space. He didn’t really know much about Kurosawa. Most things he knew were gossip and rumors. They hadn’t really had any real conversations. And before they got into this, Adachi felt like he needed to know something. It was a very forward thing to ask, but considering they were talking about having sex with each other, should there really be any topics that were out of bounds?

He cleared his throat and asked, “Why exactly did you offer to help me? I don’t really understand.”

Kurosawa had been sitting politely with his hands in his lap, having straightened his tie and smoothed out his shirt. 

Kurosawa gave him his fancy smile, the one he flashed that made everyone melt. “I gave you my word to help you, and I always stand by my word.”

“Right,” Adachi said, “But why even offer in the first place? Is it just because…” Adachi trailed off, his stomach clenched. It was one thing to think it, it was another thing to say it out loud, but he had to know. “Is it just because you want to have sex with me?”

Kurosawa had been taking a sip of his drink and choked, falling just short of spitting it out. 

He swallowed and set down the cup. “No, I mean,” he started. “Adachi, look, I presume since you said yes, that you at least are okay with the idea of being with me that way. And yes, I like men. And I think you are very handsome. But, no, I don’t just sleep around. I’ve actually only been with one person before and it wasn’t really the best experience.”

Adachi hadn’t expected that Kurosawa would share this much, but he was grateful. It helped. “But that doesn’t really explain why you offered,” Adachi pointed out, his hands shaking under the table at how nervous he was talking like this. He never talked like this with people. He avoided talking at all costs, but the ability to read people’s minds had cost him quite a bit and it felt like the price to get rid of it was worth it.

“I understand how you felt in that moment,” Kurosawa said. “I have been in professional situations before where people have presumed that an idea was mine, when it wasn’t. I think people are charmed by me and they often give me the benefit of the doubt. Anyway, even if I have corrected people, it didn’t matter.” 

Kurosawa was now looking at his hands in his lap, he was twisting his fingers together, almost as if he was nervous. “I want to do things on my own merit. If I understood you, it sounded like you wanted that too.”

That was exactly how Adachi felt. And knowing he didn’t earn it and also hurt Fujisaki made the whole situation especially painful. Bringing it back to mind made him all the more committed to figuring out how to make this work.

Adachi looked up at Kurosawa. “So, how exactly do we start?”

Kurosawa did not laugh. He did not show a hint of mockery. He just said plainly, “Well, most of these things start with a kiss.”

Adachi’s heart leapt to his throat. He thought he might throw up, which obviously would be counterproductive to what they were discussing. “O-okay,” he stammered. “Can you, can you show me how, Kurosawa?”

Kurosawa scooted forward. “Just tell me if you want me to stop, Adachi.”

Adachi nodded and closed his eyes. 

_Just try to relax._

Adachi took another deep breath in response to Kurosawa’s thought. And then his lips were warm and a little wet, the pressure soft at first and then a little more firm. Kurosawa moved his lips, massaging Adachi’s in smooth, soft motions. Adachi let out a sigh. It was a sound he didn't think he had ever made in his life. He still felt nervous, but there was another feeling that was now taking his anxiety over like a tidal wave. It was electric, radiating through his entire body. 

_Wow, he feels incredible._

Adachi’s mind actually shut off for a bit, his worries drifting off to sea. They kissed like this in a timeless state, Adachi relaxing into Kurosawa. 

_I would love to suck his neck._

Adachi pulled back with a start, eyes wide. The image of Kurosawa sucking on his collarbone burned into his consciousness.

“Are you okay, Adachi?” Kurosawa asked. 

“I...uh, I don’t know if I am ready to do _that_.”

“Do what?” Kurosawa asked again.

“That. What was in your…” he pointed a shaky finger at Kurosawa’s head. 

“Oh, sorry.” Kurosawa shrugged. “It felt nice.” 

“Well,” Adachi started to clamor for words. “Yes, uh, I mean, sure, but…”

“It’s okay, Adachi. You don’t have to explain. We can stop for now.” Kurosawa shifted himself back, smooth and easy. Adachi wondered if anything ever threw him off.

If this was the speed with which they were going to address this problem, he would no longer be a virgin by the age of 40. Adachi dropped his head on the table and covered his face with his arms, letting out a frustrated noise.

“It’s fine, Adachi, really.”

“But it isn’t! I'm going to be stuck hearing the random thoughts of the food truck operator mocking me for eating double mayo every day, and have to listen to Urabe mentally go through his checklist of his wife’s favorite flowers because he has to apologize for something and he just won’t move a few feet away so that I can breathe and I’m going to have to hear Rokkaku list all the ways he is going to imitate you to be the best salesperson ever because he is constantly coming over and rubbing my shoulders, which by the way, is technically harassment, but the kid is just so sweet and clueless he would definitely feel hurt if I ever told him to STOP TOUCHING ME and then there’s Fujisaki. I am going to keep accidentally bumping into her and keep stealing her ideas and she is going to be absolutely miserable and it will be all my fault."

Adachi expelled that all in one solid statement and had to take a deep intake of air to keep from passing out. 

“Hey, slow down, Adachi,” Kurosawa said, putting his hand on Adachi’s arm, a gentle grounding.

_Do you want to try again?_

“Yes!” Adachi unintentionally yelled.

And Kurosawa put his lips on him again and drew Adachi in calmly, sweetly and Adachi's entire body relaxed into it, covering him with warmth. Adachi’s hand dropped to Kurosawa’s leg and Kurosawa’s hand brushed through Adachi’s hair.

_Adachi feels so good. He really is so adorable. And so sexy._

Adachi choked on Kurosawa’s tongue and pulled back to breathe. 

“Adachi?” Kurosawa asked, hand still on his leg. 

_Is he choking? Breathe, Adachi, breathe._

“I’m fine,” he forced out. “But I think I need a break now.”

The look of concern on Kurosawa’s face melted away as Adachi regained his composure. “If you are still worried about Fujisaki, maybe you could help her get noticed by the Chief? If you can make up for what happened, I’m sure she would feel better and you would too.”

“But how would I do that, Kurosawa?”

“I have some ideas.”

* * *

The next day, Adachi and Kurosawa set out on a mission to determine how best to help Fujisaki. The Chief was often critical and did not frequently give them opportunities to impress him, so they would have to set up an opportunity for Fujisaki to be noticed. 

They met at the photocopier, huddled close, discussing possible ways to help Fujisaki. 

_Wow Adachi smells good._

Damn. Kurosawa’s arm was pressed up against Adachi’s and he hadn't even noticed. He was paying too much attention to the fact that he thought Kurosawa smelled good too. His mind drifted back to the previous night with their lips pressed against one another, how completely calm and at ease Adachi felt, like once their lips were on each other, Adachi was pulled into the eye of the storm, no longer swirling around in the chaos. He shook the thought loose and refocused in time to hear Kurosawa say “lunch.”

“Sorry, what about lunch?”

“Let’s meet for lunch, Adachi. We can strategize more.”

Adachi’s face warmed at the suggestion, but he agreed anyway. 

“What is happening here?” Rokkaku’s overly enthusiastic voice broke into their quiet, conspiratorial bubble. He put his hands on Adachi’s shoulders, rubbing them a bit.

_I really look up to Adachi and Kurosawa, they are both always so diligent and serious about their work._

“Oh, ah.” Adachi was never quick on his feet and Rokkaku’s hands on his shoulders resulting in access to Rokkaku’s stream of consciousness was extra distracting.

“Adachi was helping me look for the staples,” Kurosawa said, subtly moving Rokkaku’s hands off Adachi and patting his shoulders. “They are usually here by the photocopier. Have you seen them, Rokkaku?” Kurosawa’s voice was as smooth as silk.

“Right! I am on it! I will help my seniors and find the missing staples!” Rokkaku took off in the same flurry he came in, leaving Adachi to smile at Kurosawa like a fool in gratitude.

* * *

In the cafeteria, Adachi was about to go purchase lunch when Kurosawa took his arm and dragged him to a table.

_I’ve got you._

“Sorry, what?” Adachi was most definitely confused by this.

“Here,” Kurosawa said, placing a bento box in front of Adachi. He took another one out of a bag and placed it in front of himself.

“Wow, Kurosawa, did you make these?”

“Mmm,” he replied. “I really enjoy cooking. It helps me relax.” He said this as though he ever experienced anything less than complete and utter calm. If he did, Adachi had yet to see it.

“Thank you, Kurosawa. This was really kind.”

“It was nothing,” he said, handing Adachi some chopsticks. Their hands bushed briefly at the exchange.

_I love to cook and I never really get the chance to share it with anyone._

Adachi smiled and nodded to demonstrate his gratitude again. He was not used to being taken care of by anyone, except for his mother, and it had been years since she had done that in any regular fashion. 

As he ate, Adachi’s eyes drifted to Kurosawa’s lips. They were red and soft and Adachi could not help thinking about how they felt on his own. 

Kurosawa had suggested that they “practice” every night if Adachi was hoping to get to a place where he felt comfortable any time soon. Adachi had given himself a mental goal post of the end of the year, which was only about 8 weeks. On the one hand, it seemed ridiculous if Adachi could not make the loss of his virginity happen in that time frame, on the other hand, that felt so fast. He had almost presumed he would never lose his virginity in 30 years so having to get used to the idea of possibly being with someone in that way in _8 weeks_ seemed impossible.

“So I had an idea about Fujisaki,” Kurosawa began, pointing his chopsticks at Adachi. “You should start sitting next to her at our weekly staff meetings. If she has any good ideas, then we can figure out ways to help her get noticed and maybe we can find more out about what her pitch was supposed to be and help her with it.”

Adachi nodded as he chewed on his food. “You know, you are already helping me out so much, Kurosawa. You don’t have to help with this too.”

Kurosawa shrugged. “I like Fujisaki. I want her to succeed. And it isn’t that difficult. Anyone would do it.” But that was the thing, Adachi wasn't sure that anyone would.

* * *

The weekly staff meeting happened to be that afternoon and when they entered the conference room, Kurosawa kept sliding his eyes from Adachi to Fujisaki in a way that made him almost seem like he was having a stroke. Kurosawa eventually moved over and placed his hand on the chair next to Fujisaki and pulled it out, motioning to Adachi to sit next to her. 

Apparently even Kurosawa realized Adachi needed a push on this. Adachi was a bit fearful of what he might hear from Fujisaki and although he did think it was a good idea, there was a large part of him that wanted to put this off.

The Chief was presenting new market data that he wanted Adachi’s team to analyze and make recommendations based on his Emoji Clip idea pitch, especially in the context of the under 25 demographic, and he wanted Kurosawa’s team to develop sales strategies from these analyses. He was also looking for another round of new team pitches. This was Fujisaki’s chance to try again.

When Adachi pressed his arm against hers to find out her reaction to this he was surprised at what he heard.

_Another pitch opportunity. Others will expect me to compete again, but my heart really isn’t in it._

The staff began spilling out of the room back to their desks and she turned to Adachi. “It is exciting that your idea will be moving to the next phase.”

“Mmm,” Adachi said, nodding. “But what about your idea?”

_I wish I could tell people I hated that project._

“I think it was not that good. I will instead support your project.” She smiled at him sweetly and then left to go back to her desk.

Adachi dropped his head on the table. If Fujisaki didn’t want her work recognized in the way Adachi’s was being noticed, he wondered what she did want. He still felt like he stole an opportunity from her and he owed her something.

_Looks like that all went well._

Adachi looked up at Kurosawa, whose hand was on his shoulder. Adachi gave him a half smile. At least some things felt like they were going well.

* * *

As they walked together to Adachi’s apartment, Kurosawa was unusually quiet. Typically, he was quite chatty, bringing up manga he enjoyed to read or telling stories about people in the office. Adachi kept looking over at him, wondering what he was thinking. He had an impulse to slide close, to listen in to figure it out, but he pushed that aside and kept walking.

The street was mostly dark, only illuminated by a few sporadic street lights. Most people were already home for the night. Walking together in this area, it felt intimate, private.

After a while, Kurosawa said, “You’re still really nervous with me, huh?”

Adachi kind of startled, proving his point. Yes, Adachi felt incredibly nervous with Kurosawa. He did not know him very well, he was well-liked, which held great stakes if Kurosawa decided he did not like Adachi, and he was extremely handsome. He made Adachi feel unbalanced in a different way than his usual sense of unease. He never knew what Kurosawa was going to say or do and that was worrisome, but also exciting.

“Yes,” Adachi managed to share. “I generally am a nervous person. It is hard for me to get comfortable.”

Kurosawa nodded at this. 

“I get kind of stuck in my head, thinking about how things can go wrong or what I might mess up.” It was so honest, Adachi surprised himself as it came out of his mouth.

Kurosawa was still looking ahead, as though he was seriously considering what Adachi was saying, taking it all in. He always took everything Adachi said with such weight, he was never dismissive. Adachi really liked that about him.

Kurosawa looked over at Adachi and then his eyes flicked beyond him. And suddenly Adachi was being dragged by his jacket collar and pushed up against a brick wall in a dark crevice on the side of the street. In the shadows, Kurosawa worked his mouth against Adachi’s, stealing his breath, sucking on his tongue, pressing their bodies against one another in a way Adachi had never experienced. Kurosawa’s strong arms were pushing Adachi’s against the wall, pinned by his wrists. Kurosawa was making soft humming noises as he moved his lips. Adachi groaned in response, a puddle of want.

_Oh God, Adachi feels so good. I need to touch him everywhere._

And then Kurosawa’s hips pushed against his and Adachi could feel they were both very, very hard. Adachi let out a startled noise.

Kurosawa pulled away, his eyes questioning. “I’m sorry, was that not okay? I thought maybe.” He was now letting go of Adachi and moving away. “When you were saying that overthinking made you nervous, I thought maybe surprising you would help.”

It had actually helped, until it didn’t. Adachi had no time to worry, he could only feel for the first few moments. It had been rather nice.

“It’s okay,” Adachi said. “I liked it, I just, I wasn’t ready for us to, to feel you, to feel me.”

“Oh,” Kurosawa said, now looking down at his pants and adjusting them. “Yeah, that is something you will have to get used to.” He smiled. “In the name of our agreement, of course.” The way he said it, it was not mocking, but there was a hint of teasing.

Adachi laughed despite himself. The whole situation was so absurd, how could he not find humor in it. 

“Well, how about we save _those kinds of surprises_ for another time,” Adachi suggested and they continued on to Adachi’s apartment.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cherry Magic 31 Prompts: Family, Play, Kid
> 
> And here we are, chapter 3 and we are now at an Explicit rating. That was fast. But based on the premise of the fic, I hope this came as no surprise to anyone.
> 
> Thank you to the CheriMaho Discord for Kurosawa's sister's name.

Adachi was getting good at the kissing. Kurosawa was a very determined person and when he set his mind to something, he seemed as though he would not let anything, even a fairly skittish Adachi, get in the way of it. But that didn’t mean he was overly forceful. No, not even a little bit. Adachi often mused at how a person who appeared to be so assertive and forthright was also so gentle and kind. 

The regular schedule of kissing allowed Adachi to expect it and mentally prepare for it. And now that he had done that, he started to really enjoy it. It was the first time he really understood what all the fuss was about. 

It was like he was lit up from the inside out. He felt alive.

His comfort level had increased enough that he even agreed to come for a session at Kurosawa’s apartment. Kurosawa had started to cheekily call it “tutoring” and he would even mention it at the office. “Adachi and I need to go to his tutoring” or “Adachi and I can’t go out for drinks, he has a tutoring lesson.”

When others asked what he was being tutored on, Kurosawa responded without any hesitation, “confidence.” All his colleagues nodded and said it was great that Kurosawa was willing to help Adachi and they were sure that would help Adachi succeed. Adachi did his best not to faint during the entire conversation.

It was a Saturday and Kurosawa had invited Adachi over to cook for him first before one of their sessions. It felt like almost too much, Kurosawa just constantly giving to Adachi. But after lunch when they started kissing while sitting next to each other on the couch, Kurosawa made these cute little sighing noises that made Adachi think he must enjoy kissing the way Adachi had started to enjoy it. 

And then Kurosawa started to _show_ Adachi things. The first time it was Kurosawa licking Adachi’s neck. The image stirred something in Adachi, his entire body reacting. He could feel himself getting a bit hard. He liked it. But then Kurosawa started thinking about doing other things, like touching Adachi and sucking Adachi. That made the panic rise and he would have to pull back and say “double mayo.” Saying how he felt was difficult in moments where he was overwhelmed, so that had become their agreed upon way for Adachi to tell Kurosawa if he needed a break. 

Often just saying the phrase would make Adachi laugh, breaking the tension, and they would be able to resume their activities until their lips were sore and swollen. Today was one of those days and as they began kissing again, Adachi started to wonder what it might be like to touch Kurosawa a bit more. They were both leaning into one another and Kurosawa had been very careful to follow Adachi’s lead after the surprise incident. 

Adachi decided to let his hand drop on Kurosawa’s leg. Adachi could feel Kurosawa’s lips turn up a bit, as though he was smiling as he kissed him. Kurosawa’s hand dropped and covered Adachi’s. Their fingers slightly intermingling. It was a gesture that felt even more intimate than kissing somehow.

Adachi was flushing now from head to toe. He pulled back again, this time too overcome to even spit out his code word. 

“I think,” he said, standing up. “I think I need to go.”

“Are you sure?” Kurosawa asked, reaching up and placing his hand on Adachi’s arm. 

_We can just hang out, we don’t have to do this anymore._

Adachi paused. It wasn’t as if he didn’t want to spend time with Kurosawa, but the idea of staying just felt as though he would be stewing in his embarrassment. Just as Adachi was about to leave, a knock came at Kurosawa’s door. 

When Kurosawa answered, there was a tall, slender woman with a very tiny girl. The woman’s face was rather pale and solemn, and the child clung to her leg.

“Sorry for disturbing you, Yuichi,” the woman said, bowing.

“Oh, what are you doing here?” Kurosawa’s voice was filled with surprise.

“Ah,” Adachi said, getting up to stand, then bowing. He had no idea who this woman was, but they were clearly very familiar. Could this be a girlfriend? 

“This is Adachi Kiyoshi, he works with me at Tokoyama,” Kurosawa said, gesturing toward Adachi. He turned to Adachi and said, “This is my sister, Hayashi Yuzuki and my niece, Aiko.”

“Oh!” Adachi said, rubbing the back of his neck. He looked down at his clothes and smoothed them out a bit, hoping that it wasn’t obvious what they had just been doing.

He didn’t even realize Kurosawa had a sister. “Nice to meet you both,” Adachi said, nodding to both of them again. Little Aiko was snuggling a stuffed bear and hiding shyly behind her mother.

“Seki had a slight accident and is at the JRC Medical Center. He was working and slipped on his way back from lunch with some colleagues and now needs some pins in his ankle. They aren’t sure how long it will take. Will you watch Aiko for a bit while I go there?”

“Of course,” Kurosawa said, ushering them inside. “Will he be okay?”

Kurosawa’s sister looked a bit concerned, but said, “I am hoping it will just be a night. But we'll stay in the city just in case.”

“Well, then you will stay here,” Kurosawa said. 

She nodded and handed him a small pink backpack with some fuzzy pom poms. “You can text me if you have any questions. They called me when he was being taken to the hospital but I haven’t heard any updates so I’d like to go straight there.”

“Yes, of course,” Kurosawa said. 

Kurosawa’s sister kissed little Aiko, said “Nice to meet you,” to Adachi again as she nodded, gave Kurosawa the same acknowledgement and headed out the door.

Kurosawa took the little backpack and brought it into the living room. He glanced back at his niece as she stood there still silent, clutching her toy. “Maybe she has some slippers in there?” Adachi suggested.

Kurosawa opened it up and began to rifle through, finally snatching some pink fuzzy slippers that matched her pink fuzzy pom poms. He stood there for a moment, seeming hesitant. 

“Here,” Adachi said, taking them from Kurosawa and kneeling down in front of Aiko. “Hi there, Aiko. It’s nice to meet you.” The girl glanced up, but her head was still tilted down. Everything about this little one was adorable, from the tiny little shirt with an endless heart pattern, to the ribbon on the edging of her little pants, to her round, rosy cheeks. 

Adachi really loved kids. He always seemed to just get them. The world was kind of a weird place and he seemed to see it from the same angle.

Aiko reached up and grabbed one of her pigtails and twisted the hair in her little fist, the hair of the other one sticking out in thin, cute sprigs. “Do you like to visit your uncle?” Adachi asked.

“No,” she said softly.

“Oh,” Adachi said, shifting to look at Kurosawa. 

“They’ve never visited me here,” he explained. “We haven’t seen each other much in the last few years. I lived away until recently.”

“Can I help you with your slippers?” Adachi asked.

The little girl gave a nod. Adachi gently helped her slip off her shoes at the door and put on her slippers. 

_I miss my Mommy._

He gave her a smile. “There, that’s better right? I’m sure it's hard to be away from your Mom, but she will be back very soon. How old are you Aiko?”

“I’m four,” she said, now nibbling on a finger. 

“Wow!” Adachi said. “That is so big!”

She gave him a bit of a smile, but her shoulders were still folded in, her arms still clutching her bear.

“Do you want to sit on the couch?” Kurosawa asked, but she made no acknowledgement of him speaking to her.

Adachi glanced back at Kurosawa and gave him an encouraging smile. “Aiko, what’s your bear’s name?”

“Bear,” she said, now looking up at Adachi. 

“Your bear’s name is Bear!” Adachi said with great excitement.

She nodded again, this time smiling a bit. “Can I walk you and Bear over to the couch?” He offered her his hand. She gently took his finger and walked along with him until they were in the living room area and he held her hand as she climbed up on the couch. 

An image of a cup flashed in his mind. “Are you thirsty? Would you like some water?”

Aiko nodded again.

Adachi held out his hand for the back pack. Kurosawa looked at him puzzled as he shuffled through and found a little cup and some snacks.

“How did you--?” Kurosawa asked.

Adachi pointed at his head. “Plus, my cousins have a lot of little ones. We see each other on big holidays. I play with the kids. I’ve seen their routine. It isn’t a big deal.”

Kurosawa blinked again. It wasn’t usual for him to be so quiet. He placed his hand on Adachi’s arm. 

_I’m just not used to kids. She usually cries when I’m around._

“How old was she when you were around her when she cried?”

“I don’t know - maybe one or two?” He said aloud.

“She was a baby, Kurosawa! Babies cry.” 

Kurosawa looked back at her. Aiko was still on the couch, but she had started kicking her legs and running her hand in circles over the couch cushion. “I told you, I’m not used to kids,” he repeated.

Adachi couldn’t help feeling a bit amused at seeing Kurosawa this way. He was always the one with the answers. Always the one with the plan. To see him a bit unsure, a bit off balance, it was very charming. “They aren’t rocket science, Kurosawa. They’re just kids. Here,” he said, handing him the cup. “Fill this with water. I’ll get her a snack.”

After Aiko ate, she appeared to be feeling much more comfortable. She started dragging her little bear around Kurosawa’s apartment, taking a look at everything. Adachi couldn’t think of a less kind-friendly space. Every time she moved, Adachi could see Kurosawa’s shoulders tense up. 

“Aiko, you like animals right?” Adachi asked.

“Yes,” she said. Good, answering with words. That was progress.

“Do you have some blank paper Kurosawa?”

Kurosawa nodded and went rifling through a cabinet, while Adachi sat Aiko up at the table. 

“I like animals too, Aiko,” Adachi said as he folded the paper carefully. “This usually works better with special paper, but your uncle has lots of really nice stationery here. Have you been taking the samples from the office, Kurosawa?” 

“Maybe,” Kurosawa said, giving Adachi a funny smirk and folding his arms defensively.

Adachi let out a laugh and squared the paper on the table.

He had enjoyed making origami animals with his cousins' kids. It had always been an easy way to occupy them and he loved the way the paper slid through his fingers and with just a little effort became something whimsical. This paper was stiff enough that this fold was easy to do. With a few quick motions he was finished.

He pressed on the back of his creation and it bounced forward.

“A frog!” Aiko yelled. It made Adachi jump. She had been so quiet until that moment. It was like hearing a loud crash in the dead of night.

“Can we make more?” She asked, clapping her hands together.

Adachi laughed. “Sure. How about we get your uncle to help?”

Kurosawa pointed at himself and raised his eyebrows. “Me?”

“Yes, you, sit,” Adachi said, patting the table next to Aiko. He placed some paper in front of the chair and gave Kurosawa a few origami tutorials. By the time they were done, they had a whole menagerie. 

Aiko was getting antsy so Adachi suggested they go to Kogai Park to help her get some energy out. Four-year-olds needed to get outside and get fresh air. Adachi chased her around for a bit, Kurosawa standing and watching. “C’mon,” Adachi said, giving Kurosawa’s shirt a tug. Kurosawa gave him that same surprised look. “Aiko wants to play with her uncle.” He patted his arm to show Kurosawa he had heard it from her. Kurosawa still stood there, looking a bit dumbfounded. “Don’t you, Aiko?”

The little girl giggled and pulled on Kurosawa’s hand, finally getting him to chase after her and guide her down the slide. Kurosawa beamed at her as she laughed, his previous hesitance appearing to evaporate. 

The three of them spent the rest of the afternoon at the park, playing in the sun.

* * *

Kurosawa settled in on the futon that was spread out on the floor of Adachi’s apartment. 

“Sorry if it’s not comfortable,” Adachi said, as he pulled the covers up under his neck. He had turned the lights off so the only light in the apartment was the fluorescent glow from outdoor lights that peaked in through the window.

“It is fine, Adachi,” a shadowed Kurosawa said, as Adachi heard shuffling. “Thanks for inviting me to stay. I think my sister’s family will be more comfortable with some space since they released my brother-in-law.”

Adachi rolled over on his side to try to better his view, his eyes starting to adjust to the darkness. “It’s no problem,” he said. It was strange to have someone stay at his place, but Adachi was still happy Kurosawa was there. “I had fun today. Your niece is sweet.”

“Yeah, she is,” Kurosawa said. “I wish I got to see her more. Or that I saw them this time under better circumstances.”

“Are you not close?” Adachi asked. “Sorry if that is too personal of a question. I don’t have siblings so I don’t really know what’s normal.”

“We are, we can be. My sister has a lot to manage with her job and Aiko. It just isn’t the same as it used to be.”

The silence stretched between them for a bit. It was long enough that Adachi thought that maybe Kurosawa had fallen asleep. 

“Adachi?” Kurosawa said finally.

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry if I freaked you out today. You didn't have to leave.”

Adachi pushed his face into his pillow, a reflexive hiding even though he was already hidden in the dark. “I didn’t feel like you were making me leave Kurosawa. I just, I don’t know how to handle it, touching each other like that. I don’t know why, but it just feels so...so _exposed_.”

“Do you not like touching me? Because maybe you don’t and that’s okay Adachi. Not everyone wants sex.” Kurosawa’s voice had a hint of something in it that Adachi didn’t recognize. Was it nervousness?

“No,” Adachi laughed, somehow feeling protected in the dark, “that’s not the issue. I just don’t know what to do, or what you’d like or what I’d like.”

“You don’t know what you like? Does that mean you’ve never touched yourself before?”

“Oh, well, yeah, sorta.”

“Sorta? How do you sorta masturbate Adachi?”

“I don’t know. It feels fine, but I think about stuff that is not sexy and I get all distracted and it isn’t really great.”

The silence made its presence known again. This time it made Adachi well up with nerves, filling the quiet with all sorts of ideas of what Kurosawa was thinking - that he had agreed to sleep with someone who was a sexual incompetent, that he found him infinitely less attractive now that he knew how completely incapable Adachi was, that he just was tired of waiting for him to get himself straightened around. This last one really stung. Why did Adachi want Kurosawa to feel like he was worth the effort?

“Can I make a suggestion?” Kurosawa asked, breaking the suffocating silence yet again.

“O-okay,” Adachi said. There was something in Kurosawa’s voice telling him this was going to be a suggestion Adachi would find difficult to follow.

“Why don’t you try touching yourself now and tell me what works?” 

Adachi’s stomach dropped. The idea definitely made him feel many different things. Panic won out as he said, “I don’t know, Kurosawa, I don’t know what works!” 

“Okay, well then how about _I_ touch myself and I will tell you what I like and then you can try that on yourself and see if you like that too?”

Excitement swirled in Adachi’s body, down low. The idea of them both touching themselves in the same room, talking about it, it was thrilling. “Okay,” Adachi finally got out, “What should I do, Kurosawa?”

“Well, I’m sliding my hand down my pants, under my underwear and I am wrapping my hand around my cock.”

Adachi made a little noise when Kurosawa said the words, a bit shocked. He took a deep breath, a little surprised at himself that he was going to do this. But he _wanted_ to do this. He mirrored Kurosawa’s actions and slid his hand down his own underwear. He was semi-hard, already a new experience for him.

“Okay,” Adachi said.

“Now I am sliding my hands from the base of my shaft up to the head of my cock.”

Adachi again followed Kurosawa’s directions and let out an airy moan. This already felt better than it ever had before. 

“I’m gripping myself loosely, not too much pressure, but I am now sliding it up and down.” Adachi could now hear steady movement from Kurosawa’s direction and a soft gasping sound.

Adachi met the rhythm, feeling his legs tense up as he started to stroke himself steadily. 

“How does it feel, Adachi?” Kurosawa asked, his voice unsteady.

“It’s good,” Adachi hummed out, feeling a bit loose and warm. 

“Good,” Kurosawa said. “That makes me feel really good so I'm going to move my hand faster.”

“It makes you feel good if I feel good?” Adachi asked.

“Oh fuck, yes,” Kurosawa said. “Of course it does, Adachi. I am immensely turned on if the person I am with likes it. I don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with me. I definitely want you to tell me if you don’t want something.”

“Okay,” Adachi agreed. For some reason, the thought of Kurosawa with someone else gave Adachi a little twinge. But he chose to set that aside. He had no claim to Kurosawa’s sex life, they had only made an agreement. Although when they took it farther, he supposed he had a right to ask.

“Does anything else feel good right now?” Kurosawa asked.

Adachi thought for a moment. He pictured kissing Kurosawa, called to mind the image of him licking his neck. “I like thinking about us kissing,” he said, moving his hand faster. “And your fantasy of licking my neck. I think I’d like that. I, uh, think I want to try that.”

Kurosawa let out a deep groan. “I’d like to do that too, Adachi.” He was now making quiet gasping noises that was driving Adachi wild. 

“I’m moving my hand faster,” Adachi admitted. “This.” Adachi let out a soft groan. “This feels really good.”

“I’m rubbing my thumb on the head and thinking of your mouth on it,” Kurosawa said, and he moaned again.

Adachi almost came in that moment as he imagined sucking Kurosawa’s cock. It was something he had thought about sometimes as a general act, but this was very specific now, having already been spending the last few minutes wondering what Kurosawa’s cock looked like. 

“I would use my tongue the way I do when I kiss you,” Adachi said, rolling his face into his pillow again and stroking himself vigorously. “Oh god, Kurosawa, I’m going to come.”

“Good,” Kurosawa said, “Let me hear you Adachi. I want to hear you so badly. I’m tightening my grip and thinking about fucking your mouth. Fuck.”

Adachi groaned, the warmth of his come spilling all over his hands as his orgasm rocketed through his body, leaving him breathless and boneless. 

Kurosawa made a long, deep moaning noise and then became very quiet. 

Adachi grabbed some tissues and wiped his hands, then ducking his head, he slid them over next to Kurosawa on the floor. 

Adachi laid back in his bed, listening to his heart practically beat out of his chest in the silence. 

“Good night, Adachi,” Kurosawa finally said.

“Good night, Kurosawa.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took me a bit longer because I did some research on family dynamics, addresses and parenting in Japan. What is here is based on this, but clearly is from my limited knowledge. Instead of using actual honorifics or terms that are used for family, I used the best equivalent of the English translation. All mistakes are my own and I very much appreciate any comments if I miss the mark.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cherry Magic 31 Prompt: Misunderstandings

When Adachi woke up, he could have sworn he felt eyes on him, but Kurosawa looked to still be sleeping. He got dressed and ready for the day and when he came out of the bathroom, Kurosawa was dressed too. 

“Good morning,” he said, a bit hesitant. It was a tension Adachi was not used to feeling between them. Adachi wanted to ask if Kurosawa was alright with what happened the night before. But he was worried about the answer. What if Kurosawa regretted what had happened? Adachi wasn’t sure he was ready to hear it. “I have a lot of things to do today so I am going to leave early,” Kurosawa said. “I’ll meet you in the office?”

Adachi nodded, somewhat grateful to avoid an awkward train ride or taxi ride together. But also nervous about what this all meant.

But when he got to the office, there was an onigiri on his desk with a post-it that simply said “double mayo?”

Adachi’s eyes trailed across the office until he met Kurosawa’s at his desk; his body jerked as though he had been watching Adachi and he immediately looked away and busied himself with his work. Adachi settled in, putting his bag by his desk, getting out his work. His eyes kept tracking over to Kurosawa to see what he was doing, to try to read his expression, to determine what he was thinking. 

It was a dance they performed for most of the morning - quick glimpses caught, a slight crook of Kurosawa’s mouth, a quick bite of Adachi’s lip. A moment of acknowledgement, and then Adachi’s face would heat up and he would hide behind a folder and try his best not to let out a noise of complete embarrassment.

And when Adachi was not trying to steal glances at Kurosawa, his mind drifted to his words the night before. The imagery of Adachi’s lips trailing on Kurosawa’s cock, making him feel the way he had made Adachi feel. 

It was different. Starting when, he was not sure. Although the night before had made it perfectly clear, this feeling had snuck up on Adachi in stages. He looked forward to when Kurosawa was coming over, was excited about their kissing practice sessions, felt so completely and utterly filled with want as they touched themselves. Adachi had never wanted anyone like this before.

But the truth was, it wasn't only these physical feelings that were currently preoccupying every one of Adachi’s waking thoughts. No, Kurosawa made him laugh. And liked to talk about books. And just generally seemed to enjoy Adachi’s company, which Adachi did not think was an opinion many people held. He was _good_. And Adachi liked him. It was as simple as that.

By the time they practically ran into each other at the photocopier, Adachi was so keyed up he was a piece of twine ready to snap. Kurosawa smiled again and rocked back, but his movement did not prevent their arms from brushing together.

_The same and lonely languid way home never looked this bright._

“S-sorry!” Adachi said, pulling back, slightly distracted by the melody Kurosawa had running through his mind.

Kurosawa looked at him with his usual kind eyes and his easy smile. “It’s okay, Adachi.” His movement emphasized his perfect posture as he glided past Adachi, pausing for a moment to ask, “Would you look at some numbers for me? You are always so diligent with your work.”

Adachi was a bit surprised that Kurosawa wanted Adachi’s opinion on anything, but then as he thought about it, he started recalling different times when Kurosawa had asked for Adachi’s consultation or review of his work. It had become such a habit that Adachi barely even noticed. “Of course,” he said nodding.

Kurosawa smiled and gave Adachi a nod in return, moving toward his desk.

“Are you still coming over tonight?” Adachi blurted. “I mean, I didn’t know if you still needed to stay? Or if you were coming for our session?” His heart was thudding out of his chest. He could possibly become ill and faint right there. 

“Oh,” Kurosawa said, stopping in his tracks. “I thought,” he paused. “I thought maybe you might need a night off. Hence the snack,” he said, motioning with his thumb over toward Adachi’s desk.

“I know,” Adachi mumbled, now looking down at his hands. “It was a cute message.”

“Cute?” Kurosawa’s eyebrows raised. 

“I just mean, I think we gained some ground and probably shouldn’t lose momentum?” Adachi was fighting the urge to close his eyes, as though a fast moving object was hurtling toward his face and he was bracing himself for the impact.

“Okay,” Kurosawa said, an unfamiliar tense look on his face. “I’ll meet you at the end of the day then?”

“Okay,” Adachi nodded, still feeling uncertain but at least somewhat successful having gotten Kurosawa to agree to come home with him.

* * *

On the walk to Adachi’s apartment from the train, Kurosawa was unbearably quiet. There was this energy between them that Adachi had never experienced before. Adachi was often nervous, but this sensation wafted and waved between them, a kinetic feeling that made his skin tingle and set a fire ablaze deep inside him. 

When they arrived at Adachi’s apartment, he offered Kurosawa a seat on the bed and sat down next to him, his pulse racing.

“You’re quiet tonight,” Adachi noted, looking down at his hands as he twisted his fingers together.

“I have a lot on my mind,” Kurosawa answered, his voice thin, almost fragile.

Adachi couldn’t stand it any longer. Kurosawa was so very far away. He moved his hand and placed it on Kurosawa’s leg.

_Like a mirage that might vanish anytime._

“Is that a song in your head?” Adachi asked.

Kurosawa cracked a small smile. “Yes, it’s been running through my mind all day.”

“Huh, I don’t quite recognize it. What’s it about?” Adachi shifted his body weight anxiously back and forth on the bed, resulting in a barely audible creak that broke through the stilled silence in the room.

“Adachi, why did you just do that? Did you want to read my mind?”

“Oh, yeah, I guess so. I just didn’t know what you have been thinking today.”

Kurosawa let out a breath. “Could you ask me before you do that?”

“Oh, sorry,” Adachi said, pulling his hand back and placing in on the bed between them, feeling embarrassed at what he had done.

“No, it’s okay,” Kurosawa said, now sliding his pinky over Adachi’s.

_Now even this dim room is too dazzling to sleep in._

The melody of Kurosawa’s thoughts lulled him as Adachi gathered his courage. He swallowed hard. So much was swirling inside him. He didn’t want Kurosawa to feel hesitant about Adachi touching him. He didn’t want anything between them. He needed to be able to move forward. He wanted to move forward with Kurosawa. He just hoped he wanted the same. 

“Can we try something else?” Adachi had no idea how to express what was happening inside him, but continuing to work toward them being together as they had agreed seemed as good a plan as any. Adachi put his other hand to his pants. Kurosawa looked at Adachi then looked down. He swallowed and nodded. Adachi started unzipping his pants slowly, their smallest fingers now linked together, their bodies side by side. He could feel Kurosawa’s eyes following the motion of his hands, feel the intensity of his attention. “Can you think about what you imagine it would be like to be together?” 

Kurosawa closed his eyes, his chest rising and falling slowly, as he whispered, “Yes.” 

Adachi’s mind was suddenly flooded with images of their touching, of Kurosawa running his hands all over Adachi’s body. Of Kurosawa kissing him everywhere, worshiping him with his mouth.

Adachi let out a soft moan as his hand trailed over his cock, now hard and exposed. 

Kurosawa was now sending him images of sucking Adachi’s cock, of fucking him slowly, of making him writhe in pleasure. It was more intense than anything Adachi had ever experienced. He couldn't take it, it was like being shown everything he never knew he wanted. His desire was so immense he was swallowed up whole and could not find his way out. 

He moved his hand rapidly over himself as he curled his finger around Kurosawa’s, only slightly aware that Kurosawa was now breathing more heavily. Adachi could no longer hold himself upright. He relaxed onto Kurosawa’s shoulders, Adachi’s head resting softly on him as he came hard into his hand. 

When Adachi came back to himself, Kurosawa was sitting next to him so quiet, so still. 

“Adachi, are you okay?” He asked.

Adachi caught his breath and said, “Yes.” He was more than okay. He was almost calm even. He wanted to kiss Kurosawa with everything he had, tell him everything he felt.

Impulsively, Adachi dropped to the ground between Kurosawa’s legs and placed his hands on his belt. He shifted his weight, a reaction to the cold of the floor. He looked up at Kurosawa, eyes wide, heart open. “I want to make you feel good.”

“Wait, Adachi, what?”

“You’ve done so much for me and I just, I want to repay you. I just--”

Before Adachi could say more, Kurosawa pulled Adachi’s hands off him. His face was twisted, shattered. “I’m sorry, I have to go.” Adachi did not even have time to get up from the floor before he heard the door click shut and Kurosawa was gone.

* * *

Adachi felt ill. He tossed and turned that night, not fully understanding what had happened. He picked up his phone multiple times, looking at the cursor, trying to figure out what he could say, how he could fix this. It had taken all he had to start to tell Kurosawa how he felt and that ended in disaster. How could Adachi even possibly think he could do anything to improve the situation?

If yesterday was a cat and mouse game between them, today was an enemy trying to storm a fortress. Adachi kept looking at Kurosawa trying to catch his eyeline. Kurosawa was clearly and explicitly not looking at Adachi.

When Kurosawa left his desk, Adachi tried to follow. “Adachi!” Urabe interrupted. “I need your help!” Adachi sighed and sat back down, hoping another opportunity would arise later.

At the staff meeting, Kurosawa sat as far away as possible from Adachi. His heart sank. “Is everything okay?” Fujisaki asked, a worried look on her face.

“Uh, yeah,” Adachi stammered. “I’m just feeling a bit unwell,” he said. She would misinterpret the reason, but it was the truth.

Chief sat down and gruffly began the meeting. “We have the opportunity to start distributing our products with an up and coming startup retailer in Osaka. But they're meeting with multiple companies in two days for pitches, which does not leave us much time to prepare. They would also like to have our team there for dinner tomorrow night. Kurosawa has agreed to lead the team. He has asked that Fujisaki accompany him.”

Adachi smiled. “Congratulations, Fujisaki,” he said, grabbing onto her forearm.

_Oh no. Oh no, no, no. My graduate school entrance exam is tomorrow night. Cancelling would look horrible and I can’t tell Chief I have prior obligations for such an important assignment._

Adachi’s stomach dropped. Poor Fujisaki. She did not deserve to be put in this situation.

“Ah, Chief!” Adachi said, raising his hand up wildly. “I wonder if I might be of assistance here. Would this company not be interested in our new Emoji Clip product?” Adachi turned to Kurosawa, who finally met his eyes. “Fujisaki has a great number of assignments and I think it might be best for her to be able to focus on them the next few days.”

“Oh!” Kurosawa said, thankfully seeming to understand Adachi’s meaning. “Chief, I would be happy to accept Adachi as my team member instead of Fujisaki. If Fujisaki agrees, that is.”

“Mmm,” Fujisaki nodded in agreement, smile wide. “Thank you for this opportunity, but I think it’s for the best if Adachi is the team member.”

“Fine,” Chief grumbled. “Please do your best on this.”

“Yes, sir,” Adachi nodded and let out a breath of relief, happy he was finally able to help Fujisaki for once.

Adachi sat down at his desk, feeling a small sense of satisfaction knowing that he and Kurosawa would have to work together on this assignment. Kurosawa’s avoiding him could not last too long. 

Of course this idea was a classic case of be careful what you wish for - Adachi immediately froze when he found himself face to face with Kurosawa at the entrance to the supply closet. Seeing Kurosawa up close for the first time that day made Adachi’s blood heat. 

“Hi,” he mumbled. “Thank you for your help with Fujisaki. Going with you would have been a major problem for her.” Kurosawa was such a perfectly beautiful man, his eyes were so inviting, his lips were so soft. Adachi jerked as he noticed he had instinctively started to lean closer to him.

Kurosawa gave almost a sad smile. “I figured you wouldn’t speak up like that unless it was important. I’m sure you don’t want to have to go out of the city with me like this. I’m sorry.”

“No!” Adachi said. “ _I’m_ sorry. I don’t--” Adachi could not find the words to use to untangle whatever happened last night. 

“Kurosawa!” Rokkaku’s booming energy sliced through their conversation. 

“Adachi! My seniors! Chief has given me a sales assignment for tomorrow since Kurosawa will be out of town. Kurosawa, can I humbly ask you to help me prepare tonight? Your wisdom would be so helpful in my success.”

“Rokkaku, Kurosawa has his own assignment we need to prepare for tonight,” Adachi said, preoccupied by Rokkaku’s firm grasp on Kurosawa’s shoulder. Adachi ached, wishing he was the one touching him.

Kurosawa placed his hand on Rokkaku’s. “This is definitely a very important step for you, Rokkaku. I am happy to assist you.” He turned to Adachi. “It’s okay. I’ll prepare later tonight. We can discuss it on the train ride tomorrow.”

And that was that. For the first night in many weeks, Adachi did not spend it with Kurosawa.

* * *

They sat next to one another on the train, but Kurosawa mostly talked about sales strategies and presentation skills and data. Adachi nodded vigorously to show he was listening, but inside he wanted to just reach out, just find out what Kurosawa was thinking. Except Kurosawa had explicitly asked Adachi not to, so he sat shifted as far away from him as possible for most of the ride.

It wasn’t as though Kurosawa was ignoring him. He wasn’t being cruel or even unkind. He just felt distant, formal. As if they hadn’t shared the most intimate experiences Adachi had ever had in his life with another person. Like it hadn’t happened at all. Erased. Eradicated. Expunged.

Adachi was trapped in a cage of his own making. He wanted to scream, to shake Kurosawa, to say, this is not you, this is not the Kurosawa who I love to laugh with, who I want to share my day with, who I...Adachi froze for a moment and looked over at Kurosawa again. 

He was now leaning against the side of the train, eyes closed, chest rising and falling slowly. His face was so serene. If he was at all phased by the situation between the two of them, he did not show it one bit. But that was Kurosawa. Kind, caring, unselfish. He would never let Adachi know if he was truly bothered by what happened between them. He would smile and say everything was fine. But it was definitely, absolutely not fine.

It was so very quiet when they checked into the hotel. And so very quiet when they went up to their rooms. When they met back outside to go to dinner, Kurosawa literally stopped in his tracks as he faced Adachi. He couldn’t help but ask, “What is it?”

“Nothing,” Kurosawa responded and buttoned up his coat.

The words were on the tip of his tongue. Adachi wanted to say everything he had been holding inside, but he knew it wasn’t the right time. They had to focus on this dinner, they had to stay level-headed. Adachi was doomed.

* * *

The restaurant was filled with people, the low hum of talking and drinks clinking following them all the way to the table. They introduced themselves to the President of the company and some of the representatives of the rival companies who were also there for the pitch sessions. President Tanaka indicated that she wanted Kurosawa sitting next to her. Adachi sat down across from him.

Apparently the rep sitting on the other side of President Tanaka, Yamamoto Daishi, was from Kurosawa’s former company, Pentel. He was handsome with exceptionally sharp features. His smile reminded Adachi of a shark circling for signs of blood in the water. 

“How long have you worked at Tokoyama?” President Tanaka asked Kurosawa. She was young for someone in a President position and so very professional. Her clothing was pristine, her hair sleek and styled. As Adachi took in Kurosawa sitting next to her, they looked like a pair, a complement, a match. It made Adachi’s stomach turn.

“Only a few months,” he answered. “I actually was at Pentel with Yamamoto prior.”

“We miss Kurosawa so very much at Pentel,” Yamamoto said, his voice thick as syrup. 

As is usual at these kinds of outings, Adachi did his best to fade into the background. But the thing about being in the background is that you hear and see everything. Kurosawa spoke to President Tanaka about his observations about their consumers and why their products would be appealing. Yamamoto trailed his hand over her wrist and implied things with his glances. It was hard to tell if the attention from Yamamoto was welcome, but by dessert, she put her thumb on Kurosawa’s wrist and he froze. He gave her his usual blaring smile. 

Adachi knew he wasn’t supposed to do it, but he slid his foot forward under the table, wanting to be sure he knew what Kurosawa thought before making any sort of scene. 

_I just need to keep her engaged until the evening is over. You can do this Kurosawa. It isn’t a big deal to flirt with the client._

He glanced over at Adachi. He looked miserable. “Ah, President Tanaka, I apologize, but I am feeling very unwell suddenly.”

“Oh? I’m sorry to hear that, Adachi.”

“I must ask Kurosawa to help me back to the hotel. I hope you can excuse us both. We will be sure to be ready for our presentation tomorrow.” Adachi put on his most pathetic face. There weren’t too many things Adachi was good at, but looking pathetic was definitely one of them.

She blinked a bit, apparently surprised, but nodded. “Of course, I wish you a quick recovery, Adachi. We will see you both tomorrow.”

The walk back to the hotel was quiet again. There were so many things Adachi wanted to say but couldn’t. But there was at least one thing he could. “I’m sorry about reading your mind again. I just didn’t want to have us leave unless you wanted to go.”

Kurosawa tilted his head, giving Adachi a sideways glance. “I thought that might have been what had happened.”

The night was fairly cold, both their breath twisting and twirling in puffs as they walked. Adachi pulled his coat tighter, an attempt to gain warmth, an attempt to gain protection.

“Chief is going to be disappointed tomorrow. There is no way we are going to get that account now,” Kurosawa said, pulling up his own collar as they both walked a bit more briskly. “I should have done a better job at hiding my feelings.”

It took Adachi a minute to understand what Kurosawa meant. “You don’t have to flirt with clients to get them Kurosawa. I was listening to you. You’re a great salesman.”

Kurosawa was shaking his head. “That’s not all it takes, Adachi. You saw Yamamoto. He is going to stay there all night flattering her and by tomorrow she won’t listen to us.”

“I think you are so good she will have to listen to you.” Kurosawa dropped back a bit as though his feet missed a step, likely tripping a bit from rigid muscles trying to walk on uneven ground. He recovered quickly, and once in step with Adachi, he was just looking at him. As if waiting for something. So Adachi continued, “You aren’t like that guy, Yamamoto. You are so much better. God, Kurosawa, you could keep everything you have. But you don’t. You give it away. Look at how you’ve helped Rokkaku.”

Kurosawa pulled up his shoulders, a further attempt to get warm. “I just wish someone would have helped me like that when I was starting out.”

“And look at me,” Adachi said. Kurosawa’s eyes trained on Adachi, taking his statement literally. His focus was so intense. Adachi’s hands were clammy. He was somehow sweating in the cold. “I...just mean, look at all you’ve done, are doing, was doing - I don’t know if you are doing it anymore, but it doesn’t matter. You’ve helped me when you didn’t have to do anything.”

“That hasn’t exactly been unselfish, Adachi.”

“What do you mean?”

Kurosawa paused and pressed his lips together as though he was guarding against any stray words slipping out. “I mean what I said before. Sure, I want to help you because we’re friends, but it isn’t as though I haven’t liked what we have been doing.”

Adachi choked on his tongue.

They were now in front of the hotel, both clearly freezing, shuffling to keep warm. They had stopped in front of the door. Neither were moving to go inside. 

“I’m sorry for whatever I did the other day to make you leave.” Adachi’s heart was now in his throat and it was making it very hard to take calming breaths. 

“I didn’t want you to do anything because you thought you owed me, Adachi. I don’t want you to feel like there is anything you have to do that you don’t want to do.” 

Adahi felt a wave of relief wash over him. He had been so very worried that Kurosawa had felt regret about helping him. Even if Kurosawa wanted to stop, he didn’t want him to feel badly about how they had been together so far. He couldn’t take that.

“You didn’t let me finish,” Adachi said quietly now, looking down at his feet as he shuffled. “I didn’t mean it that way. I wanted to, I wanted to touch you.”

“Oh,” Kurosawa said, all movement stopped. 

“Do you...do you want to come to my room?” Adachi asked. “If you don’t want to do this anymore, I understand.”

“If you want me to come to your room. Is that what you want, Adachi?” Kurosawa’s voice had a weird unfamiliar tinge.

He waited for a moment. He didn’t want to seem too eager, but Kurosawa touching him, really touching him, was the only thing Adachi wanted at the moment. He nodded. “Yes.” 

The elevator ride to their floor was eerily quiet, except for the music being played over the speaker. The tune was familiar, one that Adachi had heard somewhere before. He started humming along, needing something to preoccupy himself. 

Kurosawa’s eyes were on him. He had accepted that Kurosawa must find him attractive since he had agreed to this arrangement, but the hunger in his gaze was so palpable. Adachi pulled at his tie, loosening his collar. It was getting a bit hard to breathe. He needed air. Adachi’s actions did not help him relax at all. In fact, Kurosawa’s eyes had darkened, his expression serious, his bottom lip swollen from chewing at it. This only made Adachi feel as though he was under some sort of spotlight, the back of neck prickling with sweat.

When they arrived at their floor, Adachi sucked in a grateful gulp of air, finally able to help his body cool down as he walked quickly to his door. Kurosawa stood next to him, fiddling with his briefcase, half looking up at Adachi now, waiting.

Adachi held the door for Kurosawa as he came inside and hovered at the front of the room. It was so very strange to see him look so uncertain - Kurosawa who always knew what to do, how to proceed, how to fix any problem - he was waiting for Adachi to tell him what to do.

“Do you want to sit?” Adachi asked, motioning to the bed. Kurosawa had sat on the bed in Adachi’s room, but for some reason that had felt different. The gesture held a whole host of implications that Adachi hadn’t immediately intended. But there was no other place for them to both sit and, well, the whole point of this was for them to touch each other, so a bed was probably a good place for it.

He nodded, placed his briefcase down on the floor and sat, folding his hands carefully in his lap. Adachi was struck, not at all for the first time, at how beautiful Kurosawa was. 

But this Kurosawa was disarming. His body was a bit slumped. He kept fiddling with his shirt cuffs. Was Kurosawa nervous? Was that even possible?

Adachi sat down next to him. It had been a few nights since one of their kissing sessions and for some reason that made it feel as though they were starting again from scratch. He smiled at Kurosawa, letting out a tense laugh. “I guess we should--”

“Adachi, I don’t think - I think maybe we shouldn’t do what you wanted to do...yet.”

Adachi’s stomach sank. Maybe Kurosawa really didn’t want to do this and he was still just being nice. “Okay, we don’t have to do anything, Kurosawa.”

“No, no!” He said, then paused, his next words more steady. “I just mean, we haven’t really touched each other yet and I think maybe it might be better to take it slow still?” Worry drifted across Kurosawa’s face. “Unless you need to make this go away now?”

Adachi had been living with his ability for weeks now. And what choice did he have, really? Kurosawa’s comfort with this arrangement was just as important as his. “No, you’re right, Kurosawa. We don’t have to rush. We can see how it goes.”

Kurosawa nodded again, taking in a very deep breath. He _was_ nervous. 

And so was Adachi. “I don’t, I don’t really know where to start,” he confessed.

“Well,” Kurosawa finally said, shifting closer and wrapping his hand behind Adachi’s neck, pulling him in, “maybe, we just start here.”

Kurosawa met Adachi’s lips, a soft press, then harder. Their lips glided together easily now. No they had not forgotten. Adachi had not forgotten that Kurosawa tasted sweet and warm. He had not forgotten that he made soft sighing noises as they moved their tongues together. 

_God this still feels so amazing._

Well, that was something at least - Kurosawa wanting to kiss Adachi. That made Adachi worry less. Although that did not mean he wasn’t worried _at all_. Kissing had started to relax Adachi before everything went askew. Now, he couldn’t get his mind to stop.

Kurosawa pulled back and gently ran his knuckle down the side of Adachi’s face. “What next?” he asked.

Adachi buried his head in Kurosawa’s shoulder, feeling so embarrassed about what he wanted to say, what he hoped he could say. Kurosawa let out a breath and the image of Adachi touching himself flooded his mind. Kurosawa was thinking of watching him. It was so incredibly hot. 

“Can we--” Adachi stuttered. “Can we touch each other? I think I’m ready to try that.”

Kurosawa took Adachi’s hand and guided it over on top of his pants, where he could feel his cock, already hard under the fabric. He kissed Adachi again, sliding his hands over Adachi’s pants. They rubbed one another for a while, kissing, touching and it felt amazing, but Adachi wanted more. He wanted to touch Kurosawa’s skin. He wanted to know how that felt.

“Can we--” Adachi started again, but this time he leaned his head up the bed, indicating that maybe they should lie down. 

Kurosawa nodded quickly, following Adachi up the bed, chasing his lips, pulling at him as if he did not want him to get away.

They laid down together, their new orientation so much more intimate. Adachi had access to all of Kurosawa now. Every inch of his body, if he just reached out and touched. And he wanted to, oh, how he wanted to just take Kurosawa all in. But he needed to not be greedy. He needed to take what was offered and be grateful. He wanted this for as long as he was given it, for as long as he was allowed. He would be happy with this.

Adachi felt bolder. He let his hand drop back on Kurosawa’s cock, still hard under his palm. Kurosawa let out a gasp at the pressure and bucked his hips against Adachi. Oh wow, yes, that was really good. He pushed harder. Kurosawa responded by putting his hand again on Adachi’s cock, trailing his finger up and down the outline through his pants, squeezing him, making him squirm. 

“Fuck,” Adachi breathed. “Kurosawa, touch me, please,” he started fiddling with his own pants with his free hand, desperate to remove the clothing between them. Kurosawa quickly came to Adachi’s rescue, unzipping his pants and pulling them open. 

“Are you sure?” Kurosawa asked, pausing his hand on Adachi’s stomach. Just the touch of his fingers below Adachi’s navel set his skin ablaze. Adachi caught Kurosawa’s mouth in answer, thrusting his tongue in Kurosawa’s mouth, letting out a soft moan. 

Kurosawa’s hand was immediately and forcefully now on Adachi’s cock, freeing it from Adachi’s boxers, revealing it between them. The air felt cool on his skin, but the rest of him was radiating heat, the skin of his cock flushed dark pink. Adachi watched as Kurosawa moved his hand up and down the shaft, in a slow steady motion at first. It was hypnotic, the movement and the waves of pure pleasure that jolted through Adachi’s body at every stroke. Kurosawa’s grip tightened, resulting in a chain reaction of Adachi’s body flexing and his eyes fluttering, unable to focus under the force of all he was feeling.

Adachi finally came to his senses enough to realize that he was no longer actually touching Kurosawa. All the focus and attention was on Adachi’s body. This would not do at all. 

Adachi rested his hand on the button of Kurosawa’s pants. A question. 

“Fuck yes,” Kurosawa said, before leaning in and finally licking Adachi’s neck the way he had been showing him over and over again. It was most definitely much sexier in reality. 

Adachi bucked his hips at the shock of pleasure that trailed up his skin as Kurosawa’s tongue moved up his body. The motion resulted in his cock pumping in Kurosawa’s hand, making his mind go blank and his body shake with the intensity. This was not going to last. Adachi had never been touched this way before. The few times he had touched himself around Kurosawa, the many times he had touched himself since, they did not even remotely compare to this. Adachi wanted to lose himself to this feeling, drown in it, succumb to it.

He forced himself to focus enough to tighten his grip on Kurosawa’s cock. He slid his thumb over the slit at the tip, feeling how very smooth the skin was there. Kurosawa hissed into Adachi’s neck. A new reaction. He sped up the slide over Kurosawa’s shaft, moving his hand even more vigorously. Adachi was so close. He was going to come and he needed to make sure Kurosawa felt as good as possible before that happened. 

Kurosawa was now sending him waves of images of the two of them, Adachi’s mouth spread over Kurosawa’s cock, Kurosawa being fucked hard by Adachi, Adachi bent over a table, Kurosawa fucking him.

It was more than Adachi could handle. He stuttered and shook in Kurosawa’s hand as he felt his come drip hot and wet down his stomach. 

When he finally came down, he intensified his movement on Kurosawa’s cock, leaning into him, kissing him breathless. It was only a few more pumps and Kurosawa moaned into Adachi’s mouth, filthy and loud.

_Wow, that was better than I had imagined._

Adachi laughed. “Yeah, I know, me too.”

Kurosawa’s face flushed. “Sorry, I didn’t mean--”

“No, it’s fine, it’s fine.” Adachi waved it off. He understood what Kurosawa meant. Adachi was completely used up; he had nothing left. He wasn't sure when he would regain muscle control enough in his legs to get up again. That whole thing was mind blowing.

Adachi leaned his head against Kurosawa’s shoulder. “Can we just stay like this?” He asked. Kurosawa pulled him closer and nodded. Adachi’s mind filled with a subtle harmony, the same one that he had heard previously coming from Kurosawa’s mind. It was a calming, soft, bittersweet tune that Adachi tried to hold onto as it carried him off to sleep.

_Please don’t vanish like fireworks fading into the sky._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyrics are from "Summer Illusion" by Omoinotake and can be found [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ib4DjThgEkc&t).


	5. Chapter 5

Adachi had slept in his rumpled clothing. His stomach was sticky with come. He had not moved one inch since Kurosawa said it was okay to lean on his shoulder. Adachi was not going to move one finger out of place for fear it would shatter everything. He'd slept all night in Kurosawa’s arms. It was the best feeling he had ever experienced. 

Even though Kurosawa was somehow still asleep, he was still emitting feelings that filled Adachi with warmth. This ability was so strange. It was hard to say what he would get from people. Kurosawa was the person he had read the most and the information could really be anything - stray thoughts, still images, actual scenes and now this, what just felt like pure, radiating emotions. This was Adachi’s favorite by far.

He felt so content and full, basking in whatever Kurosawa was emanating. The feeling was wafting off him, mixing with everything they had experienced last night, sending Adachi reeling. It was more than he had ever experienced in his life.

Kurosawa’s eyes fluttered open.

_I can’t believe I slept here last night._

He started shifting, surveying his own rumpled clothing, his own mess covering his body. 

_What am I even doing?_

He got up and started fixing his clothes. Adachi’s stomach dropped. Would he leave again? Had he been somehow hiding how he truly felt about this all along? But no, he sat down on the edge of the bed, a distance between them. Adachi wrapped his arms around himself, the lack of Kurosawa’s warmth making him feel completely exposed.

“I should take a shower and get ready,” Kurosawa said. “Was that, are you, is everything okay?”

Adachi nodded. “Thanks for staying with me.”

Kurosawa gave him a half smile and a nod. “I’ll meet you in an hour?”

Adachi wanted to reach out and kiss him, to part ways with this affection that was spilling out of him. He knew this was their normal way of being, but normal now felt deficient, lacking. He wanted so much more. Still he nodded again because that was the only choice he had available to him.

* * *

As Adachi had anticipated, Kurosawa’s presentation to President Tanaka was steller. He had prepared well and knew all the details cold. When she pressed on the reported profit margins from other retailers, Kurosawa could give her exactly what she wanted and had very solid arguments why those margins and circumstances would apply to her company. Adachi interjected occasionally with a point, but he knew this was where Kurosawa shined. He did not need his help.

She sat back, jaw set. A firm, pressed smirk on her face. Yes, Kurosawa did well indeed.

So well, in fact, that on the platform just as they got off the train, she called him and told him that Tokoyama landed the account.

“Should we celebrate?” Kurosawa beamed. This Kurosawa was exquisite. So full of life, of joy, of pride. Truly, really proud of himself in the best way, in a way he had earned, had deserved. Kurosawa rarely showed this. It was an expression to savor, for it likely would not be given again soon. 

“We’re closer to my apartment, should we drop our things off there?” Adachi suggested.

Kurosawa agreed and they caught a taxi there. The whole ride Kurosawa had not come down. He had this silly, relaxed, genuine smile on this face. Kurosawa’s smile was often for other people - to help them feel at ease, to feel comfortable. This smile was bursting from the inside out, pure and honest and for no other reason than he was clearly very happy.

In Adachi’s apartment, they put down their things and stood for a minute just looking at one another. Adachi couldn't help but continue to bask in Kurosawa’s glow. He wanted to touch him, wanted to know what he was exactly feeling, wanted to feed back to Kurosawa all he was experiencing.

Kurosawa looked at his watch. “It’s a bit early for dinner.”

“Do you want some tea?” Adachi asked, motioning to his table. Kurosawa nodded and sat down.

Even when Adachi had prepared them drinks and was sitting next to Kurosawa at the table, they were both still smiling like foolish children. It couldn’t be helped. It was all Adachi could do in response to the lightness emanating off Kurosawa.

He didn’t want to break the mood, but there had been something he had been wondering and he wanted Kurosawa’s opinion. “What do you think we have to do to get rid of my magic?”

Kurosawa had been sipping his tea, abruptly placing the cup down. “How do you mean?”

Adachi could do this. If they could touch each other the way they did the night before, he could _talk_ about these things.

Adachi let out a breath. “I mean, what exactly makes someone not a virgin anymore? Because honestly, what we did last night felt a lot like what I thought sex would feel like.”

Kurosawa pursed his lips, a thoughtful bend of his eyebrow. “I would agree, Adachi. I don’t really know specifically, but yeah,” his voice quivered a bit, “that felt like sex to me.”

That helped. If this was what it felt like, if this was what he should expect, then what was holding him back? If he was honest with himself, the idea of having sex was less scary now and more a looming ending to a story he was very much enjoying. Once Adachi’s mind reading was gone, that meant no more “tutoring” with Kurosawa, no more sharing this secret thing between them, no more _them_.

Adachi shifted himself closer to Kurosawa, leaving just an inch between their knees. “Then there’s no harm trying something else, then?” He almost couldn’t believe himself. He felt sorta drunk off the events of the last twenty four hours and all he wanted was more, more, more.

Kurosawa’s face relaxed, his expression open, his mouth a bit agape. “I suppose not,” he said, moving so their knees touched.

_What are you proposing?_

Adachi got up on his knees and moved forward. He kissed Kurosawa, sweetly, gently. It had always been Kurosawa kissing him first, always him taking that first step, but this time it was Adachi. And it felt amazing.

He was leaning forward, his hands on Kurosawa’s thighs, kissing him and kissing him and kissing him. It took all the restraint he had not to climb completely into his lap. 

Kurosawa was responding in kind, his lips so warm, so soft, his fingers entangled in Adachi’s hair.

_What is happening?_

Adachi smiled through the kiss, his cheeks sore with all the smiling he had been doing. He was manic with all the happiness. “I know you're worried about taking it slow,” Adachi said, now pulled back, their foreheads pressed together, Kurosawa’s tie in his hands, taking in one another’s breaths. “But you have been showing pictures to me of my mouth on you for _weeks_ now and it is just about at the level of torture. Please, Kurosawa. Please, just let me.”

“Fuck, Adachi, do whatever you want,” he said, voice raspy. 

Adachi sat back on his knees and undid Kurosawa’s pants, pulling them open. He messily shoved his hands down them, pressing his palm over Kurosawa’s cock as his lips found their way to Kurosawa’s neck, his turn to do the licking. His skin tasted delightfully salty as Adachi moved his mouth over Kurosawa’s pulse point. Kurosawa let out the deepest groan in reaction. It sent a thrill through Adachi knowing how he could make Kurosawa react.

_Oh fuck, fuck, fuck._

This angle was difficult, his hand getting caught up in fabric and elastic bands. He sat back on his knees again, pulling Kurosawa’s cock out of his pants. Adachi had touched Kurosawa’s cock last night, but he did not get a good look at it. It was slightly curved, but fully erect, flushed a dark, almost purple hue. And he was leaking, _leaking_ with anticipation. It was so hot Adachi might die from it.

Adachi ran his tongue over the slit, tasting Kurosawa. It was bitter and warm, but also absolutely wonderful. Kurosawa fell back with a punched out groan, stabilizing himself with his arms, propping himself up.

Adachi took him fully into his mouth, as far back as he could manage, which was really only about halfway down. Kurosawa’s cock had a decent amount of girth and Adachi had a pretty strong gag reflex. He hit the back of throat and coughed. Pulling up, still sputtering a bit. Kurosawa laughed. _Laughed._ And covered his mouth, his eyes full of shocked surprise. 

“Hey!” Adachi said, “This is harder than it looks!” He could have been hurt, but he could feel Kurosawa’s fondness flowing through him. He knew it was meant playfully. Sex was just weird, messy and sometimes awkward and funny. Adachi could live with that.

But still, he wanted to wipe that smirk of Kurosawa’s face. He took Kurosawa in his mouth again, this time not so far down, instead using his hand to move on the shaft from the base to meet his mouth. Kurosawa shuttered. No more laughing. 

Adachi let his tongue move around the shaft, lapping at various sections of skin. It was a bit hard to coordinate, the licking and sucking and hand motions, but when he got into the right rhythm, Kurosawa’s thighs were shaking and his hips were rocking in motion with Adachi’s movements. Adachi sucked down harder. 

The images that Kurosawa was sending off were particularly disorienting. He seemed to be laser focused on what Adachi was doing, Adachi getting periodic images of his mouth around Kurosawa’s cock, but from outside himself, making his mind glitch.

Kurosawa grabbed a handful of Adachi’s hair, his chest heaving, his breathing rapid. “Adachi, I’m...mmmmm….I’m gonna come.”

Adachi knew Kurosawa was giving him warning so he could stop, but he didn’t want to. He wanted as much of Kurosawa as he could have, he wanted everything. Kurosawa’s cock started pulsing against Adachi’s tongue. He froze, eyes closed, mouth dropped open.

Adachi pulled up, swallowing Kurosawa down. He watched as Kurosawa came back to himself, shoulders relaxing, breath steadying.

“That was,” Kurosawa gasped. “That was amazing.”

Adachi beamed, always pleased with a job well done, but particularly proud in these circumstances. Adachi's stomach swooped, as Kurosawa pulled him into his lap. 

_My turn._

They kissed, Adachi fully aware of Kurosawa’s taste on his tongue. He felt nervous again. The idea of Kurosawa taking a turn made his thoughts stutter. If Kurosawa got his mouth around him, he would have no resistance left. He would be completely consumed. His feelings were thinly veiled at best, he had no idea how he would keep any semblance of composure.

Just as Adachi was going to kiss Kurosawa again, throwing all caution to the wind, Kurosawa’s phone started buzzing. Adachi looked over at it on the table. “Do you need to check that?”

“I’m sure it isn’t important,” Kurosawa said, grasping the sides of Adachi’s face and pulling him in for a kiss. 

“Kurosawa,” Adachi said, disapprovingly.

“Fine, fine.”

He held onto Adachi’s back while he reached for his phone, unlocking the screen with one hand. The ease of this motion was very sexy, as though keeping Adachi steady in his lap and taking care of whatever else was necessary at the same time was not some juggling act. “Shit,” Kurosawa said.

Adachi’s eyes grew wide. He'd heard Kurosawa swear in his thoughts, or in reference to sex, but not about other things. 

“Sorry, my sister is in town for a follow up appointment for my brother-in-law. She wants to have dinner tonight. 

Adachi patted Kurosawa’s shoulders. “Then you should go.”

“That’s really not fair, Adachi. I can’t just leave…like this.”

Adachi smoothed the fabric of Kurosawa’s shirt. “I think you showed me how to handle it myself,” he said, not looking up, his cheeks red hot.

“What did I--? Adachi!” Kurosawa said, putting his finger under Adachi’s chin and tilting his face so their eyes met. 

_That is incredibly hot. Stay focused, stay focused, stay focused._

“What are you focused on?” Adachi asked.

“Nothing. Can I?” He said, holding the phone. “I should try to call her.”

“Oh, of course,” Adachi said, feeling very sad about exiting Kurosawa’s lap, despite the full knowledge that if they weren't touching each other for this purpose, Kurosawa didn't want to be this close or Adachi in his head.

“Yuzuki, hi, yes. I can meet you,” Kurosawa said into the phone, eyes softly looking back at Adachi as he zipped his pants back up. “Adachi? I’m actually with him right now. I can ask. Just a minute.”

He dropped the phone from his ear. “My sister asked if you would like you to join us for dinner?”

“Me?” Adachi hissed in a whisper. “Why?”

“She says to thank you for your help with Aiko. It sounds like Aiko has asked about you.” Kurosawa shrugged. “If you don’t want to, I can make an excuse.”

It was really a very sweet offer. And he very much would like to see Aiko again. But the entire scenario also sounded extremely awkward considering what they had just been doing. But ultimately, Kurosawa had done so much for Adachi, being kind to his family was really the least he could do,

“Tell her I would be happy to join,” he said. Kurosawa gave him that easy smile again, the one from the inside out. Adachi would likely do anything to see that smile, so if this is what it took, so be it.

* * *

The restaurant was near Kurosawa’s apartment, so they took a taxi there together. Adachi was still reeling. He had made Kurosawa come less than an hour earlier. Him. Adachi. He did that. You would think that along with those actions would come the ability to look Kurosawa straight in the eye, but he still couldn’t. He could feel Kurosawa's eyes on him, trying to look busy on his phone, but glancing over at him, watching him. 

Adachi wrung his hands together in his lap. He considered again telling Kurosawa how he felt, but the words got stuck in his throat. What if Kurosawa misunderstood again and Adachi offended him? What if Kurosawa didn’t want to keep their agreement because of his feelings? Kurosawa was so kind, if he thought that them being together this way was somehow harmful to Adachi he wouldn’t be able to follow through. And then where would Adachi be? A virgin forever?

No, it was too much risk. The likelihood of Kurosawa having feelings for Adachi was similar to winning the lottery. Any confession was much more likely to hurt Kurosawa and possibly end their friendship. Even after their agreement was over, Adachi would still have that. He very much still wanted that. 

* * *

When Adachi arrived at the restaurant with Kurosawa, little Aiko stood in her chair and called out, “Uncle! Adachi!” She was wearing a very cute light blue dress, as if they had dressed up to go out to eat. 

The two adults at the table stood and bowed to Adachi in greeting. “Good evening, Hayashi,” Adachi said to Kurosawa’s sister. 

“Adachi Kiyoshi, this is my brother-in-law Hayashi Seki.”

“Nice to meet you,” Adachi said, bowing again.

“Thank you for joining us, Adachi,” he said in return.

“I hope we didn’t interrupt your evening,” Kurosawa’s sister said, smiling.

“No,” Adachi said bashfully, “We were going to have dinner anyway. Thank you for the invitation.”

“I want Adachi and Uncle to sit next to me,” Aiko declared. She climbed down from the chair next to her mother and sat down in the one at the end of the table, in between the two remaining empty chairs.

“Adachi,” Aiko whispered. “I can make my own cat now! Mommy taught me!”

“She is very interested in origami now, thanks to Adachi.”

“That’s great, Aiko! I’m very impressed,” Adachi said, sitting down in the chair next to her.

“Uncle,” Aiko said, now turning to Kurosawa, “I’m happy you’re friends with Adachi.”

Kurosawa looked over at Adachi, eyes soft. “Me too.”

Adachi looked down, but he couldn’t help but smile. Their friendship was something he truly treasured and it made Adachi overflow when Kurosawa said such things.

Adachi was able to relax much more at dinner than he had anticipated. Aiko continued to be a joy and Kurosawa’s sister and brother-in-law seemed kind. There was really only one point where dinner was tense and it was during the strangest of conversations.

“So, Adachi, will you be joining our family for a bit on New Years? After you spend time with your family, of course.”

“Oh, I...no. I mean, that’s not really,” Adachi stammered. Kurosawa was looking at his sister with a strange look on his face, and the look she returned to him was almost smug. “I don’t really think it would be appropriate for me to attend.” 

“Why not, Adachi?” Aiko chimed in.

“Oh, well, New Year’s celebrations are for family and other special people in your life.”

“But you're special, Adachi,” Aiko said, a look of utter confusion on her face. 

Adachi smiled at her. “I’m glad you think so.”

Kurosawa had been watching the two of them, a complicated look on his face. He turned to his sister. “Yuzuki, Adachi has a family he needs to be with on the holiday.” Kurosawa’s voice was almost stern.

Kurosawa’s sister waved her hand, “I was just making sure he knew he was welcome.” She turned to Adachi, “I understand if you cannot attend. But maybe we can get together so you and Aiko can play again sometime? She seems to have grown attached.”

Aiko grabbed Adachi’s thumb and he saw them all running around in the park together. Adachi smiled again, remembering how full his heart was then. 

“I’d like that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyrics are from "Summer Illusion" by Omoinotake and can be found [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ib4DjThgEkc&t).


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am no good at waiting, so here is the final chapter.

“I can walk you to the train,” Kurosawa said after they had said their goodbyes to Kurosawa’s sister and her family. “It’s on the way to my place.” Adachi nodded. He'd had the tiniest bit of hope that maybe Kurosawa would ask him to come over. But they had already put their practice time in that day so he shouldn’t expect more.

As they walked, a sudden stream of people surrounded them. It looked like a tourist bus had emptied and Adachi and Kurosawa were separated by the onslaught. Dozens of voices were now warring inside Adachi as he moved through the crowd. He had become better at avoiding large groups of people, but sometimes it was impossible. And every time it made his head spin. This time, the voices became garbled, a high pitched thrum that cut out all other noise.

It was too hard to focus. His chest was tightening. He couldn’t breathe. He trudged forward, finally breaking through the crowd and stumbling over the curb and into the street.

Kurosawa, who had stopped and was waiting for him, now hurried to offer Adachi his hand. Adachi made to grab for it just as he heard a loud engine rev from a distance. Kurosawa turned his head toward the noise.

The image of a vehicle speeding toward Kurosawa was sharpened in Adachi’s mind. 

‘Kurosawa!” Adachi yelled, and pulled as hard as he could, toppling Kurosawa over on the ground on top of him, the two of them rolling over to the side of the road. 

The car sped past, not even breaking. Adachi’s heart was going to beat right out of his chest.

“Are you okay, Adachi?” 

Adachi nodded. He dusted his pants off. Kurosawa stood up and offered Adachi his hand.

_God, that was scary._

“Yeah, it was,” Adachi answered. “Kurosawa! Your lip, it’s bleeding!”

Kurosawa licked the corner of his mouth. He brought a finger up to the spot and gently pressed it, examining a bit of blood on his finger. “I think I bit it when I was startled,” he said. “It’ll be okay.”

Adachi’s hands were trembling. He knew they were both fine, but he was still shaken. 

“Hey, Adachi, why don’t we go to my place for a bit, you look like you could use some water.”

Adachi nodded, feeling faint. Kurosawa’s apartment was only a few blocks away, but Adachi’s feet were heavy and uncoordinated. After a block, Kurosawa grabbed Adachi’s waist and pulled him into his side, walking with him hip to hip. It was grounding feeling Kurosawa next to him, so solid, so secure. He smiled in thanks.

The familiar tune came dancing into Adachi’s head from Kurosawa’s mind.

_Like a mirage that might vanish anytime._

“It’s that song again,” he noted. “You’re always thinking it. What is it?”

_Now even this dim room is too dazzling to sleep in._

Kurosawa paused for a moment. “ _Summer Illusion_ ,” he said, his voice sounded hesitant. “It helps me keep focused if we are touching. I just think about the song.”

“Oh,” Adachi said. Kurosawa used this song to keep his thoughts away from Adachi. It made sense. Who wanted their entire internal life on display? But for some reason, knowing this made him feel a bit sad. The song had come to feel like something they shared, not something to keep them apart.

* * *

At Kurosawa’s apartment, Adachi settled onto the couch with a cold glass of water. His pulse still felt as though it was racing. He just couldn’t seem to shake it. When Kurosawa went back to the kitchen and dropped something resulting in a loud _bang_ , Adachi jumped. 

“Sorry, sorry,” Kurosawa said, coming over and pulling Adachi into his chest. “Hey, it’s okay, Adachi. I know that was scary.”

_It’ll be alright._

Adachi pulled back and looked up at Kurosawa. He still had a bit of blood at the corner of his mouth. He pressed his hands on each side of Kurosawa’s face and brought him down as Adachi gently kissed his swollen lip. He continued to press gentle kisses all along Kurosawa’s lips.

“I don’t want to wait anymore. I don’t want them in my head anymore.”

“Are you sure, Adachi?”

Adachi nodded. “I need you to touch me. I need you close to me.”

They kissed again, even more careful than usual, if that was possible, Adachi fully aware of Kurosawa’s swollen lip. There was no more practice. This was it. Adachi’s hands were resting on Kurosawa’s chest. He could feel Kurosawa’s heart thudding rapidly. Regardless of how Kurosawa felt about Adachi, at least he knew that he wanted this. Wanted to be together this way. Even if it was just this one time.

Kurosawa took Adachi’s hand and led him to his bedroom. The room was neat and organized, like every other part of Kurosawa’s home. The bed was expansive, plenty of room for two people. Adachi swallowed hard.

He sat down and ran his hands over the rich blue blanket. It reminded Adachi of the dark night sky.

Kurosawa was standing out of arm's length beside the bed, looking, waiting. Adachi took a deep breath and patted the bed, signaling an invitation. Kurosawa moved slowly, sitting down next to Adachi, but still not touching him. 

When Adachi had become a magic user, he was constantly startled by how much he touched other people. In the hallway, in the elevator, on the train. But the thing was, that was incidental touching. That was Adachi being touched by accident, without reason. Adachi had no idea what it was like to touch, or be touched, with intention, with purpose. 

And that was what he gained from his agreement with Kurosawa. Someone who wanted to touch him, someone who meant to do it. Someone who wanted to be close to him. Even if Kurosawa’s reason for doing so was just to feel good, because, god, did it feel good. But it had become more to Adachi. 

It had given him the opportunity to be an active participant in his life. To do something. To not just respond to others’ suggestions or coaxing, but to want for himself, to take for himself. 

Even if it was just this one time.

Adachi pulled on Kurosawa’s tie, working at the knot, removing it from around his neck and dropping it to the floor. Next, he moved his attention to unbuttoning Kurosawa’s shirt, pulling the tails out of his pants, and tugging it off his shoulders.

In all the time they had spent together, he'd never seen Kurosawa just in his undershirt. It clung to his shoulders and his muscles in a way that made Adachi want to smooth the fabric out over Kurosawa’s skin, so he did. He let his palms glide down the front of his shirt. He could feel Kurosawa’s nipples beneath the material, round and hard. 

He looked up at Kurosawa, who he now realized had been watching him, eyes wide. He slid his hand down Kurosawa’s arm, taking his wrist and placing his hand on Adachi’s waist. “Please,” he said in a whisper.

Kurosawa pulled him in. This kiss was no longer gentle, but ravenous. Kurosawa was going to devour him and Adachi was going to happily let him.

Kurosawa undressed Adachi much more quickly than Adachi had had the courtesy to do for him. Once he was down to only his t-shirt and boxers, Kurosawa slid his hands under Adachi’s thighs and pulled him into Kurosawa’s lap. Adachi grabbed on with a surprised noise, but laughed as he sat down to straddle Kurosawa’s hips. 

Kurosawa’s hands were now roaming, touching any part of Adachi that was available to him. Working his mouth along Adachi’s clavicle, letting out soft groans as he clawed at Adachi’s ass, rocking their hardness together. 

The fabric of Kurosawa’s waist band dug into a sensitive part of Adachi’s skin. “Kurosawa, pants,” Adachi gasped. 

Kurosawa rocked and lifted Adachi again, this time laying him out on the bed. Adachi had no idea he could just move him like that. It made Adachi crazy.

Kurosawa dropped his pants to the floor and left them with no regard for their condition later, Adachi’s body, his laser focus. 

When he climbed back on the bed, he moved over Adachi’s body and laid himself out on top of him, his arms framing Adachi’s head, his legs surrounding Adachi’s legs. He was cocooned in Kurosawa’s touch. 

They kissed again, Kurosawa now trailing his fingers through Adachi’s hair, rocking his hips against Adachi’s hard cock. Adachi let out an airy whine. 

Kurosawa finally came up for air and held himself above Adachi, the muscles in his forearm straining. Adachi trailed the lines of Kurosawa’s arm for a moment, just looking. 

“How do you want to--?” Kurosawa asked. 

Adachi chewed on his lip for a moment, then said, “When I think about it, you’re inside me.”

_Adachi has been thinking about this._

Adachi gave a nervous laugh. “How would I not think about it? Isn’t this what we have been talking about for the last several weeks?”

Kurosawa smiled. The real, internal glowing smile that Adachi loved. “Okay, but first I get to take my turn.”

“Your turn?” Adachi asked, completely thrown. And then there was an image in his mind of Kurosawa taking Adachi completely, fully into his mouth. Adachi let out a squeak. Kurosawa hiked up Adachi’s shirt, exposing his chest to the cold air. He worked his mouth over Adachi’s chest, working his way down his flank to his navel, stopping at the elastic of his underwear. Adachi could feel Kurosawa’s warm breath heating his skin. His insides twisted, his cock pulsed. 

Kurosawa must have felt it too because his sweet smile quickly transformed to something darker, something more determined. This was definitely not fair.

Kurosawa started tracing the edge of the band with his fingertip. Then he moved it over the fabric, tracing the outline of Adachi’s cock. It twitched again in response. “Fuck,” Adachi breathed. “Is this, is this a good idea?” 

“It will relax you, make it easier,” Kurosawa mumbled into Adachi’s stomach as he licked the skin right above the tuft of hair on his pelvis. 

“Okay,” Adachi said, tensing from the stimulation. He hadn’t realized that was what Kurosawa had been waiting for, but as soon as the word slipped out of his mouth, his underwear were being torn off him, leaving Adachi’s bottom half completely and utterly exposed.

Kurosawa grabbed a tube from his bedside table and dropped it on the bed. “Do you want to finger me?” Adachi asked. 

“I think it will help,” Kurosawa said gently. 

He stretched back up to give Adachi a very long kiss, sucking his bottom lip into his mouth, entangling their tongues before he moved himself back down Adachi’s body again. 

_If that’s okay._

Adachi nodded, trying to relax. His stomach was fluttering, uncertain what to expect, but wanting very much to find out.

Kurosawa brushed the back of his fingers up and down Adachi’s inner thighs, below his balls, over his stomach, before he then grasped the base of Adachi’s cock and fully and completely sucked it down into his mouth. Either Kurosawa’s mouth was bigger or Adachi’s cock was smaller, or maybe a little of both, but he took Adachi all the way to the back of his throat. Warmth and smooth wetness enveloped his whole shaft, jolting pleasure through Adachi’s pelvis and diffusing outward. He pulled up, sucking hard and Adachi felt like his soul was being evacuated from his body, his hips bucking to chase the feeling, to keep some grip on reality. 

Just when Adachi thought he couldn’t feel any more, a cold, wet finger started to massage his entrance. His balls were tightening, his legs tensing.

 _Not yet._

A warning from Kurosawa to try to keep himself calm. Try to not come yet. It would be hard if he kept moving his mouth that way.

Adachi grabbed at Kurosawa’s hair. “Slow down,” he begged. Kurosawa nodded as the pressure from his mouth lightened. 

_Can I try a finger?_

Adachi nodded again, unconsciously opening his legs for Kurosawa. There was a bit of pressure and then a push and some resistance. And then Kurosawa sucked harder with his lips and Adachi groaned as everything relaxed and Kurosawa’s finger slid all the way inside him. He worked it slowly as he sucked, Adachi coming apart under Kurosawa’s motions. It was rival sensations, his brain darting from one touch to the other, unable to focus, unable to keep control. 

_Adachi tastes amazing._

Another push, another stretch, Kurosawa’s tongue lapping at his shaft, moving rapidly now, making his body quiver. He couldn’t stop, it was a tidal wave crashing to shore. The pleasure exploded through his body, lighting all his nerves on fire as Kurosawa sucked him dry.

His chest was heaving, his entire body over sensitive and wrung out. 

_God, that was beautiful._

Adachi laughed. He was absolutely hysterical. He had gone mad. He needed this to keep going.

“What now?” He gasped. “Will you fuck me now?”

_Fuck. That’s all I want._

Kurosawa was now climbing Adachi’s body, Adachi assisting by pulling him upwards until their mouths met and he was tasting himself on Kurosawa’s tongue. “I want you to fuck me Kurosawa, please.” Kurosawa grabbed the edge of Adachi’s shirt and pulled it completely off over his head, so Adachi was now fully naked.

Kurosawa laid down to kiss him again. “Okay,” he finally whispered, sucking Adachi’s ear, rutting against Adachi’s legs, fully hard. Another image of Kurosawa fucking him from behind came into his mind.

“You want me on my stomach?” Adachi asked.

Kurosawa bit his lip. “I think it might be more comfortable for you.”

_Since you’ve never done this before._

Adachi tried to get his arm muscles to move, but he was still boneless. He rocked himself to try to gain some momentum, but was caught by Kurosawa’s arms and flipped over onto his stomach. Adachi let out a gentle oof, a zing of pleasure shooting through him as Kurosawa moved his body where he wanted it. His body was malleable, pliable, like it would do whatever Kurosawa commanded of it. Adachi liked the idea, liked the idea he was Kurosawa’s to use. 

He tilted his head, trying to see what was happening. Kurosawa’s palms were now smoothing out Adachi’s shoulders, sweeping down his back. Adachi had never thought much about his back before this moment; now every nerve on his skin was awake and aching. He moaned into the bed, his cock already somehow beginning to harden again. 

Kurosawa pulled up Adachi’s hip and pushed a pillow beneath them. And then there was a press, a gentle burn, a stretch. It was oh so very slow, a centimeter at a time, a shallow flick of Kurosawa’s pelvis as he entered Adachi. 

_I can’t believe this is happening._

It was exquisite agony, every movement closer, until Kurosawa was fully inside Adachi. They laid there like that for a moment, just both breathing, Kurosawa’s chest moving against Adachi’s back. 

And then Kurosawa flicked his hips harder and Adachi’s brain whited out. He clawed back at Kurosawa behind him, trying to grab a hold, trying to feel him there. He turned his head again and Kurosawa’s lips met his as he leaned over Adachi’s shoulder, kissing him fiercely. Their mouths open, lips braced against each other as they gulped down air while Kurosawa rolled his hips, sending shocks of pleasure through Adachi’s entire body again and again. 

Kurosawa worked in a rhythm. His cock twitched inside Adachi as he let out a moan.

 _Fuck, I’m close._

Kurosawa shifted his weight, tilting Adachi so he was almost sitting in Kurosawa’s lap. He continued to thrust up into Adachi, reaching around his body and stroking Adachi’s cock, Kurosawa’s sweat tingling on Adachi’s skin. Adachi moaned into Kurosawa’s other arm, which was now cradling Adachi’s head.

Adachi tried to hang onto any sliver of consciousness as his body drowned in Kurosawa. He fucked into Adachi again and again and again. Their bodies moving together, writhing together. Adachi met his rhythm, discovering he could bear down and make Kurosawa moan. And then Kurosawa froze, a punched out groan echoing in Adachi’s ears as he pulsed inside him. 

Hearing Kurosawa come undone like that was all it took to make Adachi spill over onto Kurosawa’s hands, another orgasm splintering through him.

He laid there, completely spent in Kurosawa’s arms, no longer able to use any of his muscles. No longer able to form words.

_I guess it's over._

Adachi jumped and startled himself. “Apparently not,” he said. His mind swirling. How is it possible that his magic wasn’t gone? He wasn’t a virgin anymore right? He felt as though he hadn’t been a virgin for a few days now, but surely now, it was indisputable?

“Adachi?” Kurosawa said, wide-eyed. 

_You can still hear me?_

Adachi nodded and sat up, rod straight, pulling his body into a ball. This couldn’t be happening. It wasn’t right. He did what he needed to do to make this go away...and yet.

“Hey,” Kurosawa said, reaching out to soothe him. 

Adachi flinched. “Are you sure you want to do that? Who knows what I’ll hear.”

His chest was tight, his body ached. His brain was spinning. 

Kurosawa’s expression was calm as a placid lake. How could he be calm? How could he not be upset? He had spent weeks helping Adachi and for what?

_How about I run you a bath?_

Adachi stared at Kurosawa’s hand on his wrist. 

“Let’s just take a minute. I’ll make you something to eat.”

Adachi nodded, a feeling of warmth filling him up from Kurosawa’s touch. He was so absolutely kind and caring. Adachi didn’t deserve it.

Kurosawa left Adachi tangled in the sheets, as if he was a toddler having a tantrum who just needed space to calm down. And maybe that was the case. Maybe if he just calmed down he could figure this out. Except, he had just been fucked senseless by Kurosawa. So how could anyone expect his brain to be functioning properly? He was completely on overload, unable to fully comprehend all that was happening to him.

Kurosawa came back wearing a robe, looking as if he had already cleaned himself up. The thought made him a bit sad, that Adachi’s scent wasn’t still on his body. He shook those thoughts loose, and told himself to stay focused.

* * *

After Adachi’s bath, he settled in a chair at Kurosawa’s table. It was late, close to midnight, but he wasn’t even one ounce tired. 

Kurosawa placed some noodles in front of Adachi and sat on the other side of the table. “I have an idea.”

Adachi was shaking his hair, trying to get it to dry faster. He froze and said, “What kind of idea?”

“Well, one, I am still kind of questioning the veracity of Urabe’s advice. But two,” he said, counting on his fingers, “if he was correct, maybe we just didn’t do it the right way?”

“How is there a wrong way to have sex, Kurosawa?” Adachi said, disbelievingly. 

“I would one hundred percent agree with that statement, Adachi, and yet here we are. So, maybe we have to try something else.”

“What else is there left to try!” Adachi dropped his head to the table and folded his arms around his face. 

Kurosawa cleared his throat and then slid his food next to Adachi.

Oh, _oh_. “Really?” Adachi’s eyebrows had migrated so far up his face, he thought they might be lost in his hair.

_What’s the harm in trying?_

‘Unless you don’t want to,” Kurosawa quickly added, now looking down. The tops of his ears looked somewhat pink. “We try this, and it doesn’t work, no harm, no foul. The agreement can be done.”

_And I’ll try to find another way to help Adachi._

Adachi pulled back his foot, now feeling as though he intruded. But warm knowing that even after their agreement ended, Kurosawa still cared enough to want to help.

Okay, fine. He could do this. It wasn’t something he had considered before, but Kurosawa clearly had, and in his mind, he had liked it. If the worst thing that came out of this was giving Kurosawa something he wanted, then there really was no harm in it.

And he was being gifted the chance to be in Kurosawa’s arms again. 

Adachi nodded, more as an indication to himself that he had decided to do this than anything. He stood, took Kurosawa’s hand and motioned to the bedroom with his head.

_Now?_

Adachi intertwined his fingers with Kurosawa’s and pulled gently. A "yes, now."

This time it was Kurosawa’s turn to follow along willingly, trailing behind Adachi into the bedroom. Adachi took the belt of Kurosawa’s bathrobe and loosened it. “I need you to help me.”

“Yes, of course,” Kurosawa said, gaping. Adachi pushed himself up on his tip toes and kissed Kurosawa again, sliding the robe open and slipping his hand under, taking in all the readily available skin. Kurosawa let out a staggered breath as Adachi started to suck on his collar bone, using his mouth to work across from one side to the other. Licking down, taking one of Kurosawa’s nipples into his mouth and lightly biting it.

Kurosawa hissed. He hiked up Adachi’s robe, the front falling open. Kurosawa’s hands were on Adachi’s sides, his thumbs slotted below his hip bones, stroking gently, driving Adachi mad. His cock twitched, begging for attention.

Adachi pushed forward and Kurosawa walked backwards with no resistance, sitting down on the bed. He stood between Kurosawa’s thighs, his body encircled in Kurosawa’s arms and legs. Kurosawa’s hands were at the small of his back, pulling him in, as he placed his lips on Adachi’s chest, soft fluttering kisses all over his skin. Kurosawa began stroking Adachi’s cock. Adachi’s head dropped back, adrift in pleasure, a deep moan escaping his throat.

_God, he is stunning._

When Adachi came back to himself, Kurosawa had been looking up at him, watching. Adachi dipped down, grabbing onto Kurosawa’s thigh and pushing, guiding him to move back on the bed, Kurosawa still willingly following.

“Do you need me to help get you ready?” Adachi asked. He really had no idea what he was doing, but he wanted this to be as good for Kurosawa as possible.

“Yes,” Kurosawa breathed, pulling his bathrobe off his arms and dropping it off the bed. Adachi was still a bit damp from his bath, the cold air brushing goosebumps over his skin. He left the robe on his arms, the rest of it hanging off of him. 

“What do I--” Adachi said, surveying Kurosawa’s body spread before him. He pulled Adachi to kiss him again and the image of Adachi fingering him was like lightning. Okay, he could do that. 

He took the lube and covered his fingers, rubbing them together a bit, trying to warm up the liquid that was cool to the touch. 

“So I just?” Adachi asked, rubbing circles against Kurosawa’s rim. Kurosawa’s eyes closed as he moaned at the contact. 

_Just a little pressure._

Adachi pressed his finger inside Kurosawa, just a bit, where it was warm and tight. It was completely scandalous and he loved it. But he wasn’t sure how much force to use. He had experienced this, he knew it would ache, but Kurosawa had been so very careful and he was trying his best to do the same.

Kurosawa’s hand dropped, taking Adachi’s wrist and guiding the force until Adachi’s finger was fully inside him. He bit his lip and moaned. Oh, wow, that was sexy. Kurosawa continued to direct the motion of Adachi’s finger as he fucked in and out of him, stretching him out. Adachi watched him as he writhed with his eyes closed, seemingly lost to feeling.

_Another._

Adachi obediently added another finger and Kurosawa bucked against his hand. Adachi had the rhythm now, but Kurosawa shifted his fingers ever so slightly and his whole body trembled. Adachi thrust in again, confirming the spot that had made Kurosawa let go. 

Kurosawa dropped Adachi’s wrist and fell backwards groaning with every movement, calling out “Yes,” when Adachi added a third.

“Do you want me now?” Adachi asked, leaning over Kurosawa as he gave another firm thrust.

_Fuck yes, please. Now._

“Do you want to be on your stomach?”

Kurosawa shook his head, pulling Adachi in for a ferocious kiss, sucking his bottom lip. “I want to see you,” he said. He put a pillow under his hips and pulled Adachi between his legs. 

Adachi finally discarded his robe and covered his cock with lube. He was completely hard in anticipation. He held himself above Kurosawa and pushed in slowly. Fuck, he was so tight, Adachi was going to lose his mind. 

He kissed Kurosawa again as he flicked his pelvis. Kurosawa let go of a high whimper in response. Adachi was doing that. Adachi was making Kurosawa sound that way. He fucked him harder. 

It was different doing the fucking, the sensations were different, the feeling of closeness was different. It wasn’t better or worse, just another way to feel close to Kurosawa, another way to have him be marked as the first in Adachi’s life. A fact, an experience, a truth nothing could ever take a way, not even magic.

He watched Kurosawa as he thrust. Adachi was less nervous being together this time, so he was more able to take him in, more able to watch as Kurosawa lost himself. 

Another image of Adachi jerking him off settled in his brain. He could do that too.

Adachi shifted onto his forearm and he reached between them. The angle was a bit awkward, but he was determined. Kurosawa deserved to feel everything good. Adachi wanted to give it to him. He stroked his cock gently until Kurosawa started bucking up in his hand. But he couldn’t gain purchase and still fuck Kurosawa with the intensity that had made him moan. This would not do.

Adachi took Kurosawa’s hand that had been clawing at Adachi’s back, and moved it to Kurosawa’s cock, the two of them stroking Kurosawa together until he finally took full hold of himself and moved with full determination. Adachi watched Kurosawa chase his pleasure while he returned to the task of fucking him senseless. Adachi was sweating now from the effort, their bodies now slick and gliding together in perfect coordinated motion.

“Adachi, I’m going to--” Kurosawa cut off, his whole body tightening around Adachi, his face awash in his ecstasy. 

That was all it took. Adachi had never been more turned on than to see Kurosawa come completely undone. He let go of himself inside Kurosawa as all the feelings Adachi had for him exploded through him. He loved this man, he loved this man. He loved him.

Kurosawa’s hot come spilled between them as he pulsed. They collapsed, panting into one another’s skin, still wrapped up together, holding on with the knowledge that letting go meant releasing one another for good.

Now that they had finished, Adachi had a fleeting thought to test it, to try out whether they had finally, finally made his magic go away. But his body was spent, his mind exhausted and Kurosawa was radiating a glow that pulled Adachi deep, deep down into sleep.

* * *

Adachi woke from a sound slumber, his head resting on Kurosawa’s chest. He lay there, savoring the moment, listening to his heart beat. He was stealing moments. Either he would find out when Kurosawa woke up that they had finally rid him of the magic and their agreement would be over, or Adachi would still have it, and Kurosawa had made it clear that there was no need for them to be together this way again. 

Either way, this perfect moment, this indescribable feeling was fleeting. Kurosawa breathed deeply and shifted a bit. And Adachi was hit with an image of the two of them laughing, teasing one another, smiling at one another.

And it was such a perfect image, it made Adachi break inside. His eyes welled with tears, it was slipping through his fingers and he had no way to stop it, and no way to get back a normal life. 

It was too much. He couldn’t face Kurosawa in the morning, tell him that he was still broken, still wrong. He knew Kurosawa would want to help Adachi, but should he have to bear that weight? Should he have to try to make sense why the so-called rules of the Universe had no interest in applying to Adachi?

He slipped out of bed. He left a note on the table: _I needed some air._

Adachi grabbed his coat and set out for a walk. It was early morning hours, the sun not yet risen. The air smelled crisp and he breathed in deep, feeling recharged by it. There were only a few people on the street, readying themselves for the day. Adachi wandered over to the walking path by the river to look out at the glistening water. In some ways, Adachi had been given this precious gift, but what was the use of knowing what other people thought if it drove them away?

There had been a part of him that was fearful to let it go. Worried that if he no longer had it, his window into other people’s lives would be permanently and irrevocably closed. But in that moment, he knew this ability was no longer an opening, but now a barrier.

Adachi’s skin began to prickle with cold. He looked up, and large, white snowflakes were littering the sky. He stood there still as they slowly covered the ground. It was the first snowfall of the season, which always made Adachi feel a sense of something returning, of starting again.

_You’re going to freeze._

A warm hand on his arm guided him to turn around. Kurosawa stood there bundled in his coat, his shoulders hunched for warmth. 

“I won’t freeze,” Adachi said. “But clearly I still have bigger problems.”

_We’ll figure something out._

“Stop it, Kurosawa. Just stop being so nice. I can’t take it anymore. I can’t. I can’t stand being this close to you and yet so far. I can’t stop these feelings.” Adachi pulled his arm from Kurosawa’s grasp and turned to walk away. He needed to think, he needed to figure things out. The ground had become slick with the new snow and his attention was scattered, his foot slid and felt himself falling.

And as usual Kurosawa’s hands were there to catch Adachi. Holding him up. Keeping him safe.

_What feelings?_

“I can’t stop, Kurosawa. I can’t stop loving you.” Adachi blurted, a handful of Kurosawa’s jacket was the only thing keeping him on his feet.

Kurosawa beamed, his easy, open smile. “I love you too, Adachi.” Kurosawa pulled him in closer. “Haven’t you been able to feel it? I know I haven’t been able to hide it. I’ve tried. I kept thinking about that song and I tried to keep you from touching me casually and just focus on how much I wanted you physically when we did. That wasn’t really so hard. But I’ve done all I could do. I couldn’t control it. I couldn’t make it go away.”

“But the song was because you didn’t want me in your head.” Adachi was not fully processing everything Kurosawa was saying. 

“Adachi, it’s a song about someone who is worried that their love won’t last, that it’s only for a fleeting moment in time. That song was in my head because _you_ were in my head.”

It was like the ground gave way below Adachi’s feet. He held onto Kurosawa, trying to steady himself. Adachi met his gaze and could not help but smile back. “But what about the mind reading?”

“I don’t care. We’ll figure something out. Let’s just figure it out together.”

Adachi could no longer not be kissing this man. He pressed his lips against Kurosawa’s and they stood in the cold, arms around one another, creating their own warmth. 

When they finally parted, Kurosawa pulled Adachi inside his jacket, wrapping him up tight to his chest. 

“What do we do now?” Adachi asked. It was still for a moment, the wind picking up, the street still eerily quiet. “I guess you don’t really have any ideas either,” Adachi muffled into Kurosawa’s coat.

“Well, I don’t,” he said, “but I had suggested we start by going back to my place. Did you not hear that?" 

Adachi had not. 

* * *

Adachi had fallen asleep again. Admittedly, he was already physically and emotionally exhausted before he set out in the early morning hours in a fit of frustration and desperation. But by the time he and Kurosawa returned to his apartment, Adachi was barely coherent. 

His insides were wobbly, like the feeling when you were a kid and you spun around in circles and stopped, but the world kept spinning. That’s kind of what it was like when he lost his magic. 

Adachi kept touching Kurosawa to test it, eyes barely open as he wrapped his body around Kurosawa in bed, kissing his skin, nuzzling his neck, stroking his hair, daring it all to return. 

But it didn’t. 

He finally drifted off as Kurosawa traced small circles on his back. 

When he woke, the sun was sprinkling across the floor in Kurosawa’s bedroom. The side of the bed Kurosawa had occupied was empty. Adachi bolted upright, heart hammering in his chest, his sense of unease not yet laid to rest.

But when he made his way into the kitchen, Kurosawa was there, humming away, preparing breakfast. Adachi nestled up behind him and wrapped his arms around Kurosawa’s waist, another test.

“Should we just plan to stay in today if you are going to be attached to me like this?”

“Yes,” Adachi said muffled into Kurosawa’s back.

“Will you let me grab some dishes?”

“No,” Adachi said, still pressing his face into Kurosawa’s back.

Kurosawa shifted his weight back and forth, and then clicked off the stove. He twisted himself so that Adachi was now clutching his chest. “Well, then maybe we should just quit our jobs and stay like this forever.”

“Don’t tempt me,” Adachi said.

“I know yesterday was a lot, but it's good, right? This is good?”

“It’s amazing,” Adachi said, sighing into Kurosawa’s chest.

“Then what’s wrong?”

“I just don’t really know why it happened? It clearly wasn’t the sex because we did a LOT of that and it did nothing.”

“You say that like it was a useless endeavor.”

Adachi pulled back and shoved Kurosawa in the arm. “If I don’t know why the magic left, how do I know it won’t come back?”

“Well, when did you notice that you couldn't hear me anymore?”

“After I told you how I felt.”

“Had you ever done that before with someone? Taken that risk?”

“No, never.”

“So maybe it was a different first time then. I told you not to listen to Urabe.”

“Kurosawa! Don’t make jokes!”

Kurosawa gently stroked the side of Adachi’s face with his thumb. “I can’t even begin to imagine what this has all been like for you, but Adachi, you’ve gotta trust we can work through it if it happens again. Or anything else.”

“I suppose that was really what was different in that moment. I knew I trusted you then. I trusted you enough to tell you how I felt, I trusted you enough to know you would stay. That was definitely my first time trusting someone like that.”

“See then,” Kurosawa said, pulling Adachi close again. “So many first times all in one day. I think we have it all covered. But if we don’t, I am happy to do some of those things again, frequently, and enthusiastically just to be sure.” 

“Show me, then,” Adachi said, swinging his arms around Kurosawa’s shoulders. Kurosawa grabbed Adachi under his thighs and wrapped his legs around his waist.

“It really is the responsible thing to do,” Kurosawa said, as he kissed Adachi breathless. He carried Adachi into the bedroom where they spent their day lost in their second and third and fourth times, just in case.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lyrics are from "Summer Illusion" by Omoinotake and can be found [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ib4DjThgEkc&t).

**Author's Note:**

> I'm over on Tumblr @ [Incandescentflower](https://incandescentflower.tumblr.com/) or Twitter @ [IncandescentFlower](https://twitter.com/flower_incandes)


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